Bash at the Beach 1998
7/12/98 – Cox Arena in San Diego, California – Attendance: 10,095
So, 1998 WCW. If I'm correct, and I could be wrong, Bash at the Beach 1998 would be the first Pay-Per-View of the Goldberg as WCW Champion era. Looking at the card, I see there is potential. Booker T takes on Bret Hart for the WCW Television Title which could be good, a Cruiserweight Title match between Chris Jericho and Rey Mysterio Jr, as well as Goldberg stepping into the ring with a legend like Curt Hennig. The biggest story going into this match though was the tag team main event where Hulk Hogan would team with Dennis Rodman against DDP and Karl Malone, just a month or so after Rodman's Chicago Bulls defeated Malone's Utah Jazz in the NBA Finals for the second straight year. This also produced the highest buy rate for WCW of the year, even outselling Starrcade. It did a 1.50 buy rate, but the WWF's WrestleMania 14 had produced a 2.30 buy rate or something like that so it shows you where these two companies stood. Enough of that though, let's start this show.
You know, for having more money than the WWF at the time, WCW had a terrible production company for their videos. They are nearly always terrible. MEAN BAH GAWD GENE opens the show by talking about the WCW Hotline. 1-900-909-9900!
Raven's Rules Match
Raven w/ Riggs & Lodi vs. Saturn
Saturn attacks Raven as he makes his entrance. He tosses Raven around into the guardrails before choking him with a shirt. They go inside and Saturn goes to the top but either slips off or just steps off and kicks Raven. Awkward stuff. Lodi is dressed like ECW's famous “hat guy”. Saturn goes back up top but misses now. Because it's Raven's Rules, he sets up a table with assistance from Riggs. Raven's plans get foiled though as he is crotched on the top, though Saturn fails to capitalize. Raven gets a near fall inside with his feet on the ropes. Raven applies a freaking sleeper hold in a Raven's Rules match. Seriously? Saturn hits back to back suplex variations before going outside for a chair, which Tony Schiavone calls a table. Saturn places the chair on Raven's face and hits a springboard leg drop on it for two. Lodi and Riggs try to intervene but Saturn takes them out. He runs at Raven who pulls Nick Patrick in the way. Patrick gets kicked directly in the face, but sells it terribly. I never saw the point of referee bumps during no disqualification matches. Saturn puts Raven on a table, and then stacks a table on top of that one. Kanyon shows up and pulls Raven out. Saturn can see this clear as day but still jumps off and elbows nobody through the table. Kanyon raises Raven's hand in the ring, only to hit him with the Flatliner on an open chair. Riggs rolls Saturn in the ring and Raven gets his arm across him but Saturn gets his shoulder up. Saturn kicks a chair into Raven's face but Riggs breaks up the count. He gets hit with a DVD for his trouble, allowing Raven to hit the Evenflow and win.
Winner: Raven in 10:41
A Raven's Rules match with like, two weapons isn't a good start, but the random and pointless Kanyon appearance coupled with the awkward moments in the match hurt this. *1/2
More from MEAN “BAH GAWD” GENE, as he brings out Eddie Guerrero and the badass LWO theme. He cuts a promo about his nephew as he'll be facing Chavo in a hair vs. hair match later, but first, Chavo has to face Stevie Ray for some reason.
Juventud Guerrera vs. Kidman w/ Lodi
Before he was Billy, he was just Kidman and a member of the Flock. Tony Schiavone points out that the referee is Mark “Shooter” Curtis. So this ref stole Dean Malenko's ECW gimmick. Fun and fast paced sequence after the bell that The Juice gets the best of. After taking Kidman over and out, Juvi goes for a dive but gets tripped up by Lodi. Lodi beats up Juvi in front of the referee who doesn't call for the DQ. Schiavone literally just says “I guess this is Raven's Rules too.” The disconnect is apparent. Juvi does a nice dive on both members of the Flock though. As they spill outside, Kidman hits an alley-oop onto the guardrail. According to Mike Tenay, this stemmed from Kidman saying the Seven Year Itch (Shooting Star Press) is better than the 450 that Juvi does. Schiavone calls a powerbomb onto the outside a sidewalk slam. I can't make this up. Juvi goes for a top rope hurricanrana but Kidman low blows him, again no disqualification, and hits the Sky High off the top. YOU BETTER RECOGNIZE! Both men end up at the top again and Kidman gets crotched on the top rope, allowing Juvi to his a springboard hurricanrana for two. Juvi earns points with me by using one of my favorite moves, the Northern lights suplex for two. Juvi barely lands on his feet from a German and hits the Juvi Driver for a near fall. Kidman ends up missing the Seven Year Itch and Juvi doesn't miss the 450, which finishes it.
Winner: Juventud Guerrera in 9:55
Despite the issues with the rules and the lack of disqualifications being called, these two did a fine job. I enjoyed this. ***
Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Stevie Ray
As he walks to the ring, Stevie Ray promises to SLAPJACK someone tonight. Chavo has a water gun and a floaty. It's still better than Kerwin White. Eddie comes out with scissors and Chavo grabs a microphone. He dedicates the match to his uncle. He eludes Stevie and flexes to a pop. Chavo then starts to dance and this is weird. He asks for a handshake and when Stevie accepts, he submits.
Winner: Stevie Ray in 1:36
Pointless. I understand that Chavo gave up on purpose to not waste energy on this match, but then why book this in the first place? DUD
Hair vs. Hair
Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Eddie Guerrero
Chavo bites his uncle on his rear end as his “wacky” gimmick continues. Eddie rolls outside and we get a lot of stalling for some odd reason. Chavo even gets a chair while he waits. Once things finally get going, Chavo hits a back body drop as Eddie crawls on his knees to the referee. Chavo follows in exactly the same manner and bites Eddie's butt again. Eddie targets the ribs and hits a big suplex. Eddie puts Chavo in the Gory Special, which Chavo should know a counter to, since it's like, family tradition. Chavo gets some offense with a monkey flip before chopping away in the corner. Things go outside and Eddie removes the mat, to expose the concrete. Love this spot. Chavo reverses a suplex and it backfires on Eddie. Inside, Eddie hits a superplex. There's a lot of suplexes in here. He charges at Chavo but eats turnbuckle. Chavo goes for a Frog Splash but Eddie gets his knees up. Eddie uses Chavo's tornado DDT but doesn't go for the cover. He instead goes for the scissors but the ref strips him. Eddie misses a Frog Splash. Chavo gets the scissors now, and Eddie uses a small package to best him.
Winner: Eddie Guerrero in 11:54
For two guys who should have obvious chemistry, this wasn't very good. There was far too much stalling at the beginning and the ending didn't make much sense. **
Chavo laughs and shaves his own head after the contest. This causes Eddie to be a bit freaked out as he leaves.
Disco Inferno w/ Alex Wright vs. Konnan w/ Lex Luger & Kevin Nash
I won't lie, it's pretty great that Disco Inferno hails from FunkyTown. Tony Schiavone says that this is an unadvertised match and I can see why. I might not buy a PPV featuring this. Disco and Alex Wright say that they are also “bowdy bowdy and rowdy rowdy.” Konnan steals their thing and says that he's also “bowdy bowdy and rowdy rowdy.” Konnan hits a hip toss and a sloppy looking arm drag. Disco blocks a sunset flip and decides to dance. Konnan connects with the X-Factor followed by a rolling clothesline. Disco ends up sending Konnan outside, where Wright pounds on him while Luger and Nash do nothing. Then, after Konnan is done getting beat up, Luger puts Wright in the Torture Rack. Nash enters and hits the Jacknife on Disco allowing Konnan to lock in the Tequila Sunrise and Disco quits.
Winner: Konnan in 2:16
Another thing that didn't need to be on the Pay-Per-View. The Wolfpack had to use their three on two advantage to beat Disco Inferno. The crowd was hot at least. *
The Giant vs. Kevin Greene
The Giant is billed as 7 foot 4 and weighing 519 pounds. Wow. Kevin Greene enters and looks like he's on coke or something. A lot of early stalling before Greene gets Giant crotched on the top rope and shakes the ropes, though he botches that. He attempts some punches in the corner but ends up getting a spinebuster. Giant continues to bore with some big man offense as the crowd chants “Goldberg.” It was supposed to be The Giant & Curt Hennig against Greene and Goldberg but that was changed when Goldberg won the title. Giant continues to chop away until Green hits a jawbreaker of sorts. Headbutt from the Giant stops his momentum though. Green does get in some offense as he throws Giant into the guardrail a few times. Greene goes to the top and hits a flying clothesline but Giant powers out at two. He decides to taunt which allows Giant to hit the Chokeslam and end this.
Winner: The Giant in 6:58
Kevin Greene tried his best but he's not a wrestler and The Giant wasn't good enough to carry him. Boring stuff. *1/4
Curt Hennig is asked why he thinks he will be the one to beat Goldberg. He makes very valid points about his experience and Goldberg not being able to wrestle long. A video recap is shown of Chris Jericho baiting Dean Malenko into attacking him and getting suspended, changing the match for tonight.
WCW Cruiserweight Championship No Disqualification
Chris Jericho (c) vs. Rey Mysterio Jr.
The WWE Network giving Jericho his WWF debut theme is not bad. Jericho is wearing a top hat for some reason. Ah, it seems that since he won't have a match Jericho is going to do some soft shoe for the fans. JJ Dillon shows up and decides that Jericho should wrestle someone. He teases it as a guy who hasn't wrestled in six months and he thinks it's a jobber. It's Rey Mysterio and the crowd pops. Rey uses fast offense to take control and hits a springboard leg drop for two. They say Rey added about 15 pounds of muscle but he's still way smaller than he was during his WWE run. They botch a hurricanrana spot on the outside. Jericho wisely goes to Mysterio's injured knee. They fight up to the lifeguard stand in the entrance and Schiavone tries to sell falling in sand as bothersome. Rey leaps off the lifeguard post with a hurricanrana. He tosses sand in Jericho's eyes and they're back in the ring quickly. They go to the top and Jericho hits a powerslam off the top before grabbing a chair. He crushes Rey's knee with it but misses his next move with it. Rey now uses the chair and targets Jericho's leg with it. Rey goes for a springboard but Jericho catches him in a sloppy and weak powerbomb. He tries the Liontamer but Rey gets to the ropes as Dean Malenko walks down. Jericho is distracted but goes for the Liontamer again, only to have Rey counter into a pin for the three.
Winner and New Cruiserweight Champion: Rey Mysterio Jr. in 6:01
Maybe it's because Rey just came back from injury but this was kept short and they botched two big spots. Other than that, it was decent, but disappointing. **
WCW World Television Championship
Booker T (c) vs. Bret Hart
Two WWE Hall of Famers squaring off for a WCW mid-card title. Interesting. Man, WCW mishandled Bret Hart's entire run. We get a tie up and Booker hits a quick arm drag. He must have watched some Ricky Steamboat before this match. We get a series of hip toss reversals that ends with Booker hip tossing Bret over and out. Booker goes out and high fives fans, allowing Bret to send him into the guardrail. Bret continues to control inside until Booker hits a spinebuster that gets called a sidewalk slam. Seriously WCW commentary? Can you get something right? Back outside, Bret slams Booker's back into the ring post. Going to the second rope, Bret hits his excellently executed elbow for a near fall. My goodness, everything Bret does looked great. A regular move like a Russian leg sweep looks vicious. Booker gets a very sloppy roll up attempt in the corner that Heenan covers up by saying it's due to Bret focusing on Booker's back. Booker hits a big kick and manages to hit the Scissors Kick but can't cover instantly. He hits a missile dropkick but Bret gets his foot on the bottom rope because he's a ring general dammit. Bret rolls outside and gets a steel chair as he decides to get himself disqualified.
Winner via disqualification and Still Television Champion: Booker T in 8:58
Two good performers kind of mailed it in here. Bret's offense looked great but Booker kind of no sold things at the end. The disqualification finish was stupid too. **1/4
Bret continues the assault and puts on the figure four in the corner as Stevie Ray walks down. Literally walks. Bret exits as Stevie Ray poorly helps Booker to the back.
WCW World Heavyweight Championship
Goldberg (c) vs. Curt Hennig
I love Curt Hennig but he wasn't booked well in WCW at this time and was not a viable threat to the belt. Goldberg should've faced The Giant if anything so he can look like a dominant champion. Beating Hennig won't do anything for him. Also, if you wanted to put Goldberg over even more, he should've won the WCW World Title on a Pay-Per-View. If this show drew a 1.50, imagine what Hogan/Goldberg could've done. At the bell, they square off and Goldberg gets a headlock and runs over Hennig. Chops form Hennig do nothing and Goldberg does a scissors roll that looks terrible. Hennig gets hits with a sloppy slam from Goldberg. Hennig gets in his first real offense by dropping his knee across Goldberg's leg. They mention that Goldberg is 111-0. I feel like he's wrestled ALOT of matches in the like, year that he's been in WCW. Perfectplex gets hit but Goldberg kicks out which broke my heart a little. Well, it's the Hennigplex here so I understand a bit. Goldberg instantly gets up, hits a clothesline, the Spear and the Jackhammer and he's 112-0.
Winner and Still WCW World Heavyweight Champion: Goldberg in 3:50
Well, that accomplished nothing. Goldberg beat a mid-carder in his usual three minute squash. *
We get another weak video package of the build up for the main event though it not featuring any NBA clips is poop.
Diamond Dallas Page & Karl Malone vs. “Hollywood” Hulk Hogan & Dennis Rodman w/ The Disciple
Hogan's like “yea I lost the belt, but I'm still in the main event.” Michael Buffer announces that DDP and Malone don't affiliate themselves with any organizations. So WCW and the Utah Jazz don't count? Rodman and Malone start as the crowd is excited. Reports say that Malone trained hard for this and Rodman didn't, which makes sense. Also, I read that Hogan wanted this to go like 40 minutes. Thank god that wasn't the case. Rodman gets tossed outside by Malone after stalling, so he tags Hogan. They have a flexing contest and Hogan gets upset so he calls for a test of strength. Malone applies some sort of odd rest hold and then slams Hogan. DDP and Rodman gets tagged in ans they lock up as DDP shoves him to the mat. “Boring” chants echo throughout the arena and rightfully so. Rodman spits at DDP so DDP returns the favor. DDP makes Rodman's armdrag look decent. Rodman does two impressive leap frogs before totally screwing up a shoulder block. Malone and Hogan get tagged in. Hogan gets overpowered and claims Malone pulled his hair, allowing Rodman to get in a cheap shot. Hogan does a scoop slam and drops some elbows on Malone. Rodman and Hogan do some tags and double team offense until DDP gets the hot tag and cleans house. His burst doesn't last long because Hogan brings out the WEIGHT BELT OF DOOM! Now DDP plays the face in peril role as he takes a beating. My god, this match seems like it's an Iron Man match. Malone gets the hot tag and pounds Hogan's head into the turnbuckle. DDP gets the tag again and hits Hogan with the Diamond Cutter. Rodman enters and gets a Diamond Cutter from Malone. The Disciple come sin and this a Stunner on DDP, allowing Hogan to get the pin.
Winners: Dennis Rodman & Hulk Hogan in 23:47
Did Hogan and Rodman NEED to go over here? Malone lost to Rodman in the NBA Finals twice, couldn't the good guy at least get the scripted wrestling win? This was terrible and tedious. DUD
Overall: 2.5/10; Bad. Another WCW show where nearly every match is bad. The main event is abysmal and the World Title match is poor. The Cruiserweight Title match and the Hair vs. Hair match both disappoint while the only match that is worth a look is Kidman vs. Juventud. WCW continues to be the worst shows I review. Next for “Random Network Reviews” will beSurvivor Series 1996!
Judgment Day 2002
May 19th, 2002 – Gaylord Entertainment Center in Nashville, Tennessee – Attendance: 14,521
After beating Steve Austin at Backlash last month, The Undertaker earned the right to face another winner from Backlash, Hulk Hogan, for the Undisputed Championship. At this point, the brand split was struggling and ratings went down after Hogan won the title. Hogan saved the WWF in the late 80's and WCW in the mid 90's but it was too late for him to do so here. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't all his fault. Ratings continued to drop until about the summer when they heated up again. Pun intended. Moving on, this is the first Pay-Per-View ever held under the WWE name instead of WWF so let's see how the “WWE Era” begins.
The opening video package is similar to the video that The Undertaker had when he returned as the American Badass. It's kind of hyped as a Triple Main Event though I'm only looking forward to one of them.
Fun fact; the theme song for this event is “Broken” by 12 Stones, which is a song that I love, but also the same band who would later record the Nexus theme “We Are One.”
WWE Intercontinental Championship
Eddie Guerrero (c) vs. Rob Van Dam
I believe that I see Edge's mom in the crowd. Wrestling sequence opens things and RVD wins with a powerslam that upsets Eddie. RVD fakes out Eddie and then hits him with the split legged moonsault in a fun little spot. RVD nails a leg drop for two as he's controlling more offense than their last two matches. Eddie fights out of a surfboard stretch, so RVD drops an elbow and does it anyway. Eddie uses cowardly tactics to gain the upper hand. RVD does his usual impressive split and monkey flips Eddie, who has always sold that move great. Rolling Thunder connects but RVD only gets a near fall. RVD goes to the top but gets crotched and powerbombed. Because callbacks and continuity matter, Eddie misses the Frog Splash, just like RVD did at Backlash. Things get changed up though when RVD still misses his Five Start Frog Splash. They get to their feet and Eddie shouts some Spanish stuff before they charge each other and RVD gets a cross body. RVD earns a VERY close near fall with a backslide, before Eddie gets one of his own and wins after using the ropes for leverage.
Winner and Still Intercontinental Champion: Eddie Guerrero in 10:58
Two guys that are really good didn't seem to have a great match. Their Backlash encounter was better, but this wasn't bad. **3/4
Devon, Stacy Keibler and the Deacon Batista, in his first PPV appearance, are backstage with Vince McMahon praying for Stacy's safety. While they pray, Vince checks out Stacy. For the failure that was the Reverend character, Devon played it well.
WWE Women's Championship
Trish Stratus (c) w/ Bubba Ray Dudley vs. Stacy Keibler w/ Reverend Devon & Deacon Batista
I LIED AT BACKLASH! TRISH IS WEARING TINY SHORTS AGAIN! That must have been what Devon was really praying for. I guess Trish is over the whole Bubba putting her through a table less than two years ago thing. Stacy gets an early near fall with a spin kick. Trish slaps on a Boston Crab which surprised the hell out of me. Stacy gets tossed outside and throws a tantrum leading to Bubba laughing in her face. Stacy slaps him and he gets “that look” in his eyes. Batista comes in and body slams Trish. She manages to kick out and kicks both Stacy and Batista. Bulldog follows and Trish retains.
Winner and Still Women's Champion: Trish Stratus in 2:53
Nothing match that was really only used to promote the reunion of the Dudleys. 1/2*
Devon nails his brother but then feels remorse. That's a lie though as he and Batista end up putting Bubba Ray through a table. Ironically, Batista would beat these two Dudleys to win his first title in the WWE.
Vince McMahon enters Ric Flair's office and all of a sudden, because they're both heels, they forget that they've hated each other since the end of 2001 and are friends now. They talk about hos untrustworthy Steve Austin is.
The Hardy Boyz vs. Brock Lesnar & Paul Heyman
Jeff Hardy leaps out onto Brock Lesnar before the bell and then the Hardys target Heyman. Brock is back in and starts to be his usual dominant self. Jeff tries a cross body but gets caught with a belly to belly suplex. The Hardys start to get a bit of offense but Matt takes a big powerslam. Matt finally turns things around with a tornado DDT while Heyman is pissing himself. Jeff and his green hair connect with Whisper in the Wind, a jawbreaker and then double leg drops from the Hardys. Poetry in Motion hits before Lesnar is knocked outside and the Hardys chase Heyman. They get their hands on him a bit before Lesnar puts a stop to this. Brock tosses Jeff into Matt, knocking him outside and then it's F5 time for Jeff. Heyman begs for the tag and gets it. He hilariously falls into the ring and covers Jeff for the three. So, quick note, Heyman holds pinfall victories over Jeff Hardy and CM Punk.
Winners: Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman in 4:46
This was exactly what it should've been. Brock dominates, the Hardys get in their signature offense and Heyman draws heat. **
Booker T, in his nWo shirt, is being interviewed by Mark Lloyd I think. Ric Flair handpicked Booker to be the newest member and this was around the time that the nWo, Flair and Booker were all going nowhere. Booker hits on some random chick in the back who gives him her hotel key. Sharmell will not be pleased.
Handicap Match
Big Show & Ric Flair vs. “Stone Cold” Steve Austin
If I'm right, this is the last Pay-Per-View match for Steve Austin before he took his ball and went home in 2002. I can see part of why he left. Things begin with a brawl as the heels double team Austin. Flair locks on a Figure Four but it obviously doesn't end things. The double teams continue until Austin gets a chair and Charles “Lil Naitch” Robinson gets things calmed down. Austin and Flair do battle in the ring. Flair fails at doing an atomic drop, leading to a tag to the Big Show. I really didn't like their match at Insurrextion. Show beats down on Austin for a while until he tags in Flair who hits a low blow that Robinson misses. Every Flair chop gets the obvious “woo” from the fans, while Austin's punches and kicks earn “what”. Show comes in and powerslams Austin. Flair and Show now focus on Austin's leg/knee to set up for the Figure Four again. Flair comes in and slaps on the Figure Four but Austin turns it over, only to get elbowed by Big Show. Austin manages to put on the Figure Four for the second time but again takes a leg drop from Show. Austin takes control and hits Show with a Stunner but X-Pac arrives and accidentally kicks Show. Austin hits X-Pac with a Stunner and then hits Flair with one to win.
Winner: “Stone Cold” Steve Austin in 15:37
Boring match as none of these guys seemed really motivated. Fifteen minutes was too long also and that hurt this bout. *3/4
Hair vs. Hair
Edge vs. Kurt Angle
Early on, Edge gets a near fall with a rollup and does the “this close” sign with his hand that has been used from time to time since. Edge is in control as he gets Angle tied up in the ropes like Andre the Giant and Spears him. He goes for another but Angle gets loose and belly to belly suplexes him to the outside. SWEET JESUS! Angle fires away with chops while the crowd chants “Angle Sucks!” He continues to work Edge over and nails a DDT for two. He applies a sleeper and they do the “raise the arm three times spot” and of course, Edge is alive after dropping his arm twice. Angle pulls him down by the hair to stop his momentum. Front face lock time because REST HOLDS are key. Edge does rally and hits a high arching belly to belly on Kurt. Kurt now hits one of his own as this is becoming a battle of suplexes. Taz is pissed he wasn't booked in this thing. Angle lands on the apron and gets dropkicked off, allowing Edge to dive over the top and take him out. Missile dropkick back in only earns Edge two. Angle quickly busts out a German suplex to buy him some time. Edge hits a big DDT and goes to the top again, but Kurt runs up and hits another belly to belly. Edge kicks out though. Edge accidentally Spears the referee and Angle turns Edge inside out with a German. Angle gets a chair but eats a German though the referee is down. They counter each other and Edge hits a second Spear but Angle kicks out to everyone's surprise. Angle now hits an Olympic sized Spear and the Angle Slam! One, two...NO! The place is stunned and Angle is pissed. STRAPS ARE DOWN! Ankle Lock but Edge enziguris out of it. Angle is all like, “IM A WRESTLING MACHINE” as he puts the Ankle Lock right back on. Edge pushes him off into the ropes and uses a small package as he bounces off and gets the three!
Winner: Edge in 15:29
Okay, that was fantastic. I was waiting for something like this on this show and Edge and Angle delivered. The finishing sequence was something to behold. ****1/4
Angle is livid and attacks Edge after the match. However, Edge fights him off and hits the Edgecution. He takes him to the barber's chair but Angle gets free and runs away. The camera cuts to the hotel across the street as Booker T is in bed with that chick he spoke to earlier. She asks him to turn out the lights and you just know that shenanigans are coming. Goldust's voice is heard as he scares the hell out of Booker and is in bed with him, asking him to come back to their team. Booker escapes with his ass hanging out.
Hell in a Cell
Chris Jericho vs. Triple H
I don't know why, but I always thought that their Hell in a Cell match had a face Jericho and a heel Triple H. Guess I was wrong. Harley Race high knee in the early goings as HHH pounds away on Jericho in the corner. Jericho uses a rake of the eyes to gets in the driver's seat as he fires away with chops in the corner. Tim White yells at Jericho to get inside after he crashed into the corner and was hurt out there. Like Jericho was out there for his own good. HHH tosses Jericho into the cell a few times. Jericho's arm is bleeding and they continue to brawl outside. HHH goes for a piledriver on the steel steps, but Jericho reverses and catapults HHH into the cell. Jericho must be confused about the match type as he gets a ladder and takes out HHH with it. He does it again as HHH is now gushing too. The brawl continues as Jericho goes to use the ladder again but HHH hits it with a chair, taking out the former Undisputed Champion. Jericho takes a chair shot to the back as well. Jericho does get up to try and use the steel steps but gets a drop toe hold, causing him to face plant onto them. HHH picks up the steps because he's the Game and launches them at Jericho, before they spill back outside. Tim White takes an impressive bump into the cell and JR instantly gives away what's going to happen by stating “I think Tim has the key to the cell.” Jericho lays out Hunter with a chair but there's no referee to count. Jericho is pissed so he beats on Tim White as other officials open the cell and come to check on him. EVEN TIM WHITE HAS BLADED! Jericho runs in the ring but gets a spinebuster for his troubles. HHH takes out Jericho with a sledgehammer but there's still no referee. Jericho manages to escape the cell and HHH slowly follows. They go over to the announce table and HHH hits a DDT through the table. Trips gets the barb wire 2x4 as Jericho climbs the cell to run away. I don't think this feud is personal enough for this weapon. HHH tosses it up top like a moron, so Jericho uses it on him. The brawl goes on up top and Jericho applies the Walls. Mike Chioda climbs up even though I thought a Hell in a Cell couldn't end anywhere but the ring? Anyway, Triple H hits a low blow and goes for the Pedigree, but Jericho hits a back body drop. HHH is up first and hits Jericho with the 2x4.
Winner: Triple H in 24:31
This was good, but not great. It was a glorified spotfest as they tried to recreate some classic Cell spots, but something didn't click the way it should've. Maybe it's that this feud wasn't personal or big enough for the Cell. It was brutal and entertaining, but still disappointing. ***
Edge is still searching for Angle, who hides under a shower cap in a makeup chair. Next, we get a weird sex WWE promo with the Sexual Chocolate theme in the background.
WWE Tag Team Championship
Billy & Chuck (c) vs. Rico & Rikishi
Basically, Mr. McMahon handpicks Rikishi's partner and chooses Billy and Chuck's manager, Rico. So this is generally a three on one handicap match. This is the kind of thing you do on free TV. Rikishi and Billy start out with Rikishi dominating. Chuck runs in and they hit a double flapjack after Rikishi misses a corner splash. Rikishi actually goes to tag Rico, who is suspiciously arguing with a fan. Rikishi starts to fall victim to Billy and Chuck working a tag formula but then he hits a belly to belly for one. Eventually, even though Rico tries to go against him, Rikishi squashes Chuck to win the belts.
Winners and New WWE Tag Team Champions: Rico and Rikishi in 3:52
Awful. The match was crap and the booking decision was worse. Rikishi wasn't as over as he was in 2000 and putting him with Rico was pointless. 1/2*
Edge finally catches up with Angle only to be nailed with a trash can lid. Angle drags Edge out and threatens to cut his hair but Edge counters and puts him in a sleeper hold. With Angle taking a nap, Edge shaves his head and the rest is history. Kurt's hair looked dumb anyway. Edge gets the fans to chant “You're Bald” instead of “You suck” which is pretty funny.
A recap is shown of one of the worst feuds in WWE history, between Hogan and the Undertaker.
WWE Undisputed Championship
“Hollywood” Hulk Hogan (c) vs. The Undertaker
Undertaker walks to the ring because Hogan ran over his bike with a truck, even though we've seen Undertaker use multiple motorcycles. He whips Hogan with the WEIGHTBELT OF DOOM before the bell, but Hogan no sells them and starts to whip him. Hogan dominates until they spill outside where Undertaker wails away on him. Jim Ross continues to sell this as “not a catch as catch can match” which is basically him saying this will suck. Back inside, Undertaker attempts to go Old School but gets crotched and Hogan actually does a second rope suplex. Again, I refuse to call it a superplex unless it's from the top. That only gets a near fall as Undertaker decides it's time to target Hogan's knee. He decides that he's a mat wrestler and he applies some submissions. Hogan shakes that off and hits the big boot. He goes for the Leg Drop but Hogan blocks it and puts on a pretty bad looking half Boston crab. Hogan breaks it by reaching the ropes though. Taker misses a bit boot and gets crotched on the top rope again. Undertaker shakes that off and hits the worst looking Chokeslam in history for two. It's “Hulk Up” time! He hits the big boot and the Leg Drop but Undertaker kicks out. Mr. McMahon comes out as Undertaker gets a chair from ringside. Hogan big boots the chair into his face while Vince distracts the referee. Hogan brings him in the hard way and uses a very 1980's punch and leg drop on him. Undertaker hits him in the back of the head with the chair, which the referee somehow doesn't hear, and hits a better looking Chokeslam to win the strap.
Winner and New WWE Undisputed Champion: The Undertaker in 11:08
I didn't like it at Survivor Series 1991 and I don't like it 11 years later. Crap match between two guys who weren't lighting the world on fire at the time. The Undertaker title reign at least led to the ladder match with Jeff Hardy, but this was bad. *
Overall: 4.5/10; Below Average. Not a good show. The only thing you should go out of your way to catch is Edge vs. Angle. Hogan and Taker put on one of the worst main events in recent memory and even the Hell in a Cell is not must see. The Intercontinental Title match is solid but nothing else passes two stars. I remember the summer of 2002 being much better than this so hopefully, good things are coming.
Smackdown opens with a singles match between the former tag team known as the Real Americans. Cesaro broke away from them at WrestleMania when he hit Jack Swagger with the Cesaro Swing. He was set up to be a big face. Then the WWE went in the opposite direction and turned him heel. Since then he has done nothing of note, while Swagger has turned face against Rusev and earned some big pops. Swagger won with the Patriot Lock while Cesaro continues his slide. Also, to make matters even worse, Cesaro has a new theme and it's somehow worse than his already terrible theme. Just a bad time all around for the Swiss Superman. Lana and Rusev would interrupt the celebration after the match and challenge Swagger to a Flag Match at SummerSlam. Swagger accepts and we got another match set up for the big show.
Randy Orton comes out next to address the WWE Universe about the situation with Roman Reigns. By situation, he means where he beat the hell out of Reigns this past Monday because the previous week on Raw, Reigns attacked him when he was announced as the number one contender. To be fair, I have to thank Roman for saving all of us from the torture of John Cena vs. Randy Orton again.He basically claims that "The Viper" is back, which, again, is better than the weak stooge that the's been playing. He dares Roman Reigns to face him at SummerSlam as it looks like the card continues to shape up.
Rematch time as Bo Dallas gets a chance to avenge his first ever loss when he takes on R-Truth. Things are different this time around though because Bo Dallas does not get pinned. Instead, he's so infuriated that Truth ended his streak on Raw that he attacks him and won't let up, causing the referee to call for the disqualification. It's an interesting step for his character, which he continues to nail night in and night out. I'm looking forward to seeing what's next.
Rosa Mendes is being added to Season 3 of Total Divas for some stupid reason. So the WWE has to give her TV time, which is NEVER good. She took on the Divas Champion, AJ Lee, who beat her within seconds. Seriously, just seconds. The bigger story however was Paige hitting the scene after the match and pushing AJ Lee off of the stage. As EMTs checked on her, Paige shouted that she still loves AJ and that they're all just overreacting. Paige is doing better in this role than her bland face run, but it's still not wowing me like I hoped. Still, the Divas are getting storylines and shine so I'm cool with that.
Next up, the first hour main event featured Dean Ambrose taking on Kane and Seth Rollins in a handicapped match. As with most handicap matches, this wasn't the most amazing match but with three guys who know what they're doing, it was still solid. It ends in a disqualification when Dean Ambrose finally gets a bit of revenge and hits Seth Rollins with a steel chair. He hits Kane too after the match, but Rollins retreats. I keep saying it because it's true, but Rollins and Ambrose is going to be great once it finally happens. The people are clamoring for it.
We're going to squeeze three relatively short segments into one paragraph here. First, the goddess that is Renee Young interviews Chris Jericho backstage. Jericho will meet Erick Rowan in the main event and if he wins, Rowan will be barred from ringside at SummerSlam. Next, Goldust and Stardust had, yet another weird promo. I bolieve that the cosmic key they talk about is the WWE Tag Team Titles and I would like to see them against the Usos down the line. Lastly, Diego beats Fandango again because of Summer Rae and Layla. I'm all for seeing SummerLay together often but this is getting repetitive.
The Intercontinental Champion The Miz, was out on commentary for the next match. Of course he was because the match featured Dolph Ziggler. We got Dolph vs. Alberto Del Rio in a battle of guys who won the World Heavyweight Title last year and went absolutely nowhere. But as expected with these two, the match was good. These two seemingly never have bad matches, especially against each other. Thanks to Miz getting on the microphone, Dolph got distracted and that allowed Del Rio to beat him. I'm guessing we do get Dolph vs. Miz at SummerSlam. Maybe on the Kickoff show.
Because the WWE is nearly equal parts wrestling, promos and recaps now, we have to see the recap of Brie Bella vs. Stephanie McMahon again. After that, it's main event time as Chris Jericho goes one on one with Erick Rowan. Rowan is my least favorite member of the Wyatt Family, with Luke Harper being my favorite, so I wish we got Jericho/Harper. Still though, the match was fun and Jericho won, barring Rowan from ringside at SummerSlam. A bit of a lackluster finish as I think the Ambrose handicap match should've gone on last, but it still a good episode of Smackdown.
Until next time, follow me on Twitter @the_kevstaaa.
Thursday nights on the WWE Network is the place to be. Starting with my favorite weekly wrestling program, NXT, the night is always fun. NXT kicked off with the number one contender, Tyler Breeze. He was in action against Angelo Dawkins. Those who know Dawkins know that this was generally a squash match. Breeze worked the tapings with an injured finger which might explain his recent short matches. After the match he announced that he's submitting his music video to the Oscars for Best Documentary, which got a "Thank You Tyler" chant. He talked trash about the NXT Champion, Adrian Neville, who came out and talked trash back, leading to him beating down the number one contender. It was pretty badass.
NXT Divas action followed, which is nearly always a good thing. Charlotte impressed me greatly at TakeOver, but since then, she's fallen back in my eyes. She would be facing one of my favorites since her days in SHIMMER, Becky Lynch. A few weeks ago, Becky made her debut with a weird Irish dancing gimmick but that has been scrapped. She now came out to some metal type music and it reminded me a lot of Seth Rollins when he was in NXT. The match itself was better than the disappointment that Charlotte and Summer Rae put on and Becky looked really good in defeat. NXT is off to a good start.
And here comes NXT taking a step down. The Ascension arrived and the talk was all about their 302 day reign as NXT Tag Team Champions. Not to take anything away from their reign but they've had no competition. I mean, even on the NXT Specials, they've beaten Too Cool on one and on the other they bested Kalisto and Ricardo Rodriguez. Not the most impressive list. And tonight, was yet another squash victory. The biggest news out of tonight's show was the announcement of a Number One Contender's Tag Team Tournament starting next week. This should be fun to help put a jolt into the Tag Team Division and I'd love to see Enzo & Cass or the Vaudevillains win.
Of course, with NXT not having the best tag team division in the world they need some makeshift teams. Mojo Rawley and his general awfulness was interviewed backstage by Jojo. First off, I loved seeing Jojo. Second, he suggested they team up as Mojo Jojo. Best thing Mr. Rawley has ever done. Bull Dempsey decided they should team together but warned him not to mess things up. They teamed up against "The Mechanics." I seriously can't make that up. This was basically another squash that helped get the team of Mojo & Bull over for the tournament but I don't see their team being successful and it will lead to Bull destroying Mojo.
In the main event, Adam Rose faced Tyson Kidd. Not the best main event ever. This was the longest match that I've ever seen from Adam Rose and he continued to not be the most impressive. He did give Natalya a lollipop at ringside and when she took it, the fans played up the situation. Tyson went outside and threw it away. After a decent bout, Rose won with a small package. Yes, he's undefeated and has a streak but Bo Dallas and The Undertaker don't anymore. Tyson Kidd is pretty pissed as Natalya enters the ring while the fans chant "Nattie's Better." Ouch. Overall, this was a disappointing episode of NXT. I enjoyed the first two segments but everything after wasn't really interesting.
Onto Superstars, which featured Alberto Del Rio again, this time in the opener. He went toe to toe with Justin Gabriel in what turned out to be a very good match. Del Rio continues to give it his all in the ring, even on a night where he was on little watched Superstars and where he received a nasty cut over his eyes. He, of course, made Justin Gabriel tap to the Cross Armbreaker while Renee Young was delightful on commentary.
The tag team main event featured Zack Ryder and Sin Cara taking on SLATER GATOR! They even got a backstage segment that was pretty funny. SLATER GATOR is taking over and I'm okay with that. It's awesome that Heath will do everything in his power with the gimmicks and angles that he's given and this is no different. SLATER GATOR won here and are moving up the tag team ranks. A decent episode of Superstars as I do tend to skip over the recaps of the weekly action that is already recapped way too often throughout the week.
While this is not general news from the Network, it's about the Network. During the NXT tapings last night it was announced that the third NXT Special will air on the WWE Network live on September 11th. It's titled "TakeOver 2" and I'm excited. The NXT Specials have been some of my favorite shows and, while they announced the three title matches for that show, I won't spoil them here. The other big news is that there will be a new NXT General Manager announced soon. Fun stuff right?
