Samckdown 9/3/15 Review

With a new work schedule, I should have the time to do one of these Smackdown Reports weekly now. We get off to my kind of start as the New Day show up with their hilarious signs, including one that says #Booty. Comedy. They cut a promo about how much tables need to be saved. "We wouldn't be where we are today without the support of good, hard working, tables." These guys are phenomenal. This brings out the Dudley Boyz, who remind the New Day of what they did to Xavier when they returned. The Prime Time Players show up, telling the Dudleys they need to earn their keep now that they're back. This leads to a tag match between the Dudleys and the PTP. The match is solid, New Day kills on commentary and the Dudley Boyz win. Fun stuff to open the show. This is what I would to see from Smackdown. If they insist on not putting important main event angle advancement, use it to allow the midcard and tag division to shine.

After the opener, Kofi Kingston runs in the ring to slap D-Von in the back of the head. That's it. He ran away after. While they celebrate backstage, they get word they face Dean Ambrose and Roman Reigns tonight. Stardust comes out next for what looks like a match with Neville. However, the Ascension run out and attack Neville. Stardust calls them his cohorts and, after they hit the Fall of Man, he welcomes Neville to the "Cosmic Wasteland." I may not be the biggest Ascension fan but I love this. It gives them something to do and if Stardust is going to be a good supervillain, he needs henchmen. Next up, Cesaro faces Sheamus. These two had one of my favorite matches about a year ago at Night of Champions. This wasn't quite on that level, but it was still a good old fashioned hard hitting match. Sheamus won clean, which is fine since he's Mr. Money in the Bank, but Cesaro needs to rack up some wins soon. He has to have one of the worst win/loss records in the WWE. We then go to Miz TV, with Dolph Ziggler and Lana. Miz actually brings out Summer Rae, who blames Dolph for everything. Dolph and Lana show up as Dolph tries to explain what happened. Summer believes in continuity as she directs us to the tron for a video of Dolph and Summer kissing on Raw last year. Lana attacks Summer, they brawl and the segment ends. Pretty bad stuff here. The lack of Rusev, the best thing about this program, definitely showed.

There's a Bo Dallas/R-Truth match. It's short and kind of just there. They also recap Bo's trip to Suplex City recently. After a recap of the bad Beat the Clock stuff from Raw, Team PCB is interviewed until Team Bella interrupts. Charlotte tells Nikki that she put in a petition to get her shot before NIkki breaks the record for longest Divas Champion. Charlotte then competes against Tamina. Has Tamina won more than 10 matches in her career? Well, she loses here again as Team BAD continues to look like jokes and we need to drop the team thing in general. Going backstage again, Kevin Owens is interviewed. He brags about beating Cesaro twice before saying something along the lines of "it's feeding time" or "feed me more". I don't remember. It looks like we may get Owens/Ryback at Night of Champions.

Time for the main event, as the New Days takes on  two thirds of the former Shield. I felt like this was a solid main event, but considering the people involved, I thought I would enjoy it more. I'm glad the champions didn't straight up lose, as Xavier Woods jumped in to cause the disqualification. After the match, the faces take out New Day and call out the Wyatt Family. They appear on the tron and Bray cuts a promo to close things out. I rather enjoyed this episode of Smackdown. The New Day, Stardust and Cesaro/Sheamus stuff was good. The Bo Dallas, Miz TV and Divas stuff, not so much, but I liked that there was focus on the lesser feuds. Solid, fun episode. 6/10.

Random Match Reviews: Alex Shelley vs. Prince Devitt

Show: Best of the Super Juniors Finals
Date: 6/9/13
Location: Tokyo, Japan

Decided to give this a watch since I've become a fan of Finn Balor and have always loved Alex Shelley. The Bullet Club get evened out by Shelley having KUSHIDA, Captain New Japan and Hiroshi Tanahashi in his corner. I liked how they worked slow early and Devitt targeted an apparent injury from Shelley. The Bullet Club get in their cheap shots throughout, but it grows tiresome quickly. In the middle of the match, a massive brawl ensues between the sides, leading to them getting ejected. The idea in theory is great, but it takes far too long to execute, taking away from the match. Once it's down to the two men, it works well, with Shelley playing the resilient babyface. I do think that in the end, they overdo it on the near falls, having Shelley kick out of damn near everything before finally falling to a brainbuster. Really good match that had the potential to be so much more if it wasn't marred by interference and an overabundance of near falls in the end. 

Match Time - 18:25 ***¾

NXT Report 9/2/15

A short video opens the show, telling us that we are going to celebrate Dusty Rhodes with the start of the Tag Team Classic tonight.

Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic: The Ascension vs. Baron Corbin and Rhyno

Many people may have forgotten, but the Ascension held the NXT Tag Team Titles for nearly a year and are over as fuck in Full Sail. Rhyno starts against Viktor, with Viktor busting out a rolling shoulder block. Tags to Corbin and Konnor, the bigger members of each team. To take Corbin down, the Ascension use a double shoulder block. The crowd “Yahs” with each stomp that Konnor does. “One more yah” chant but Corbin rolls away from the kick only to be sent back in and stomped. Finally, Corbin and Rhyno are able to gain some traction when Viktor takes the LOD Hawk spot and goes shoulder first into the ring post. Rhyno and Corbin work him over with some quick tags. Corbin hits a big Bossman slam but only gets two. Both guys make the tag and Konnor comes in rather hot. It’s interesting to see them working as faces. Konnor flapjacks Rhyno and they call for the Fall of Man but Corbin breaks it up. This allows Rhyno to Gore Konnor and win.

Winners: Baron Corbin and Rhyno in 5:36
Perfectly acceptable match here. They played to the crowd being into the Ascension, worked quickly and accomplished what they needed to. **1/2

Devin Taylor interviews another team in the Dusty Classic, Neville and Solomon Crowe. Neville puts over what Dusty meant to him and Crowe is excited about being partnered with someone as good as Neville. Neville seems weirded out by Crowe’s level of excitement.

An ad airs to promote the NXT UK tour in December.

A Nia Jax vignette is shown.

Alexa Bliss vs. Blue Pants

Blue Pants continues to be incredibly over. Alexa Bliss attacks right at the bell, firing away on Blue Pants. Alexa goes to work on the arm, stopping to try and humiliate her at every chance. Alexa talks smack in between nearly every move and hits a nice kick to the back at one point. Blue Pants starts to rally, getting two on a Northern lights suplex. She charges into the corner but misses and Alexa trips her up. She hits a backflip knee drop before climbing up top. Sparkle Splash hits to end things.

Winner: Alexa Bliss in 3:31
Alexa Bliss still needs tons of work when it comes to in ring ability, but she is nailing her bitchy role. Standard match from them. *

William Regal is talking backstage to Johnny Gargano and Toamasso Ciampa. Tyler Breeze interrupts and wants a partner for the Dusty Tag Team Classic. Regal says that Gargano and Ciampa are the hottest free agents. Next week, they will face Breeze and Bull Dempsey. Breeze is pissed about the partner but says that he will win regardless.

A recap is shown of Emma’s win in the fatal four way match last week. Emma is interviewed after the match, reminding everyone that the “Divas Revolution” started with her.

Apollo Crews vs. Martin Stone

Apollo Crews is already pretty over. Stone gets in some quick stuff but then Apollo hits a sweet dropkick and arm drag. Stone comes back with a nice clothesline and works a wear down hold. Crews hits an enziguri and a corner splash. His flying clothesline is impressive as this dude is absurdly athletic. He hits a gorilla press followed by a standing moonsault to win.

Winner: Apollo Crews in 2:57
The kind of squash match that I enjoy. Martin Stone didn’t look incompetent, but Crews got to get in his stuff. *1/2

Devin Taylor interviews Jason Jordan and Chad Gable about their match against Neville and Solomon Crowe. They are confident that they aren’t the underdogs.

After a commercial, Devin Taylor interviews Finn Balor about defending his title on the upcoming Texas shows. He looks forward to being there for the big shows in Texas. She then asks him about the Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic and introduces Finn’s partner, Samoa Joe. Joe wants to win and they shake on it.

Eva Marie vs. Billie Kay

Eva gets free of Billi quickly and blows a kiss so Billie just big boots her for two. Eva comes back with shoulder thrusts and gets two on a suplex. She goes to her rest hold with piss poor facial expressions again. Billie counters into a small package for two. Eva shoudler blocks her down and hits a senton for two. She goes back to the same hold but Billie fights back, hitting some clotheslines. She slam/suplexes Eva and the referee should have counted three because Eva didn’t kick out. instead, he stops and she just gets up. The crowd shits all over this. She just then hits her finish.

Winner: Eva Marie in 3:43
That was awful. The crowd wasn’t hating it but that botch was terrible. 1/4*

We see an interview with Enzo, Big Cass and the Hype Bros after their win last week. They put over the New York crowd and all seem weirded out by Mojo’s hypeness. They argue about where to hang out in NY.

Next week, the Lucha Dragons face Balor and Joe.

Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic: Chad Gable and Jason Jordan vs. Neville and Solomon Crowe

Chad Gable starts with Solomon Crowe and they go to the mat. That’s a mistake if you’re Crowe because Gable is awesome there. The fans chant for Neville as Crowe and Gable work. Neville tags to a pop and works over Gable. Jordan then gets tagged and goes to the mat with Neville. Neville goes into a string of offense and they send the heels outside for a commercial. Returning, Jordan hits a sweet belly to belly on Crowe, who is playing the face in peril. As Crowe is outside and being counted out, Jordan fans Gable with his towel, which is great. Crowe rolls back in at the count of eight. Neville looked a bit annoyed by this. Jordan and Gable working over Crowe is fun since Gable is one of those guys that works the mat but makes it entertaining as hell. Crowe finally makes the hot tag. Neville flies in and does some of his enthralling offense. He hits everything moving and sets for the Red Arrow. Gable pulls Jordan out to save him though. Neville just says fuck it and moonsaults onto Jordan followed by Crowe diving onto Gable. Neville springboards in but Jordan catches him and launches him in a flapjack variation. As Neville kicks Jordan, Crowe tags himself in and hits a running knee. His next move is countered into a sick belly to belly from Jordan. The tag to Gable and they nail their awesome finisher to advance.

Winners: Chad Gable and Jason Jordan in 9:40
A really fun tag team match here. Gable and Jordan has really meshed as a team and have future champs written over them. They’re like the World’s Greatest Tag Team, with more charisma. At least Gable is. The tension between Neville and Crowe was well played too. ***1/4

Beat the Clock Raw Review

To give us something different, Raw kicked off with an opening promo from Sting. It's cool to see Sting on Raw and he spoke with passion, giving the impression of a good promo. But to me, it wasn't. Instead of talking about how much he wanted to win the WWE Title, the only top title he's never held, he instead talked about the respect he gained for Triple H at WrestleMania, even though it was an atrocious match that saw nothing get resolved. He then proceeded to verbally blow Triple H, while putting down Seth Rollins and saying he's half the man HHH is. That's so weird. Why would you build the Seth/Sting program around Sting's newfound man love for Triple H? I understand that it may be building to a Seth/HHH rivalry but still, this is all so damn odd and not in a fun way.

Our opening contest was the SummerSlam rematch between Dolph Ziggler and Rusev. Similar to their match at the PPV, it's a good contest but nothing special. After almost fifteen minutes, things end when Ziggler gets close to a win, only for Summer Rae to jump on him and cause the DQ. This of course leads to a catfight between Lana and Summer Rae. The highlight of this was some Lama booty. After the match, Dolph is interviewed and goes to his locker room, only for Summer to sneak in after. Back to the ring, Team Bella is there and Nikki reveals a "Bella Tron" that will countdown to her becoming the longest reigning Divas Champion. The Beat the Clock challenge begins to determine her next challenger. Becky Lynch is up first and makes Alicia Fox tap out in 3:21. I've never been a fan of the Beat the Clock challenge. I mean, you get a shot simply because you won a match faster? Also, what if you lose? Does the person who beat you get nothing? Continuing the shit Ziggler/Rusev/Summer/Lana angle, as Ryback is being interviewed we see Summer run out of Dolph's room and he comes out in just a towel, nearly exposing himself. DRAMA! There hasn't been enough Rusev in this angle tonight and he's the best thing about it.

An Intercontinental Title match followed as Ryback defended the gold against Big Show. The Miz is commentary, making me wonder why this feud is still going. It didn't happen at Battleground due to Ryback's injury, wasn't really worth it at SummerSlam and should be over. They put in a good effort but nobody really cared about it. Ryback won after a distraction from the Miz. The Beat the Clock Challenge continued next as Charlotte took on Brie Bella. Brie tries to stall because I guess Nikki thinks Becky is an easier challenge than Charlotte. Charlotte wants none of that and handily beats Brie in 1:40. Yup. The girl that faced Stephanie McMahon in a high profile match last year, loses in under two minutes here.

Next, we got, you guessed it, another SummerSlam rematch as Kevin Owens faced Cesaro. Honestly, I think it's impossible for these two guys to have a bad match, especially against each other. I understand they're doing the double champion thing with Seth, but I still wish this program here was for the US Title. Kevin Owens wins a good match but something is missing from this for them to have that great standout match. Still, this singles match has been the highlight of the show by far. Backstage, Lana is upset that Summer saw Dolph naked. Girl, I can use Google and see you naked anytime I want, don't be mad. Next, it's time for the debut of Braun Strowman. Bray cuts a pre-match promo thanking Sister Abigail for him and hyping him up. He faced Dean Ambrose and pretty much kicked his ass for three minutes. To be fair, it wasn't like it made Dean look bad since even Roman Reigns got his ass kicked. Strowman won via DQ because he shoved Reigns at ringside, who shoved back. Braun then proceeded to pretty much kill the former Shield members with his submission move. This was also pretty well done considering it helped get the new Wyatt over. There's probably a countdown until Bray loses his next big match though.

Time for the final Beat the Clock match as Paige faced Sasha Banks. The only positive about this is that Sasha got the full entrance with her theme music. Paige hits the RamPaige early on but Team BAD pulls Sasha out of the ring, Paige brings her in but time expires. That's it. Charlotte really earned that title shot eh? Instead of giving us something meaningful, Sasha and Paige go for less than two minutes and the other matches were short too. It's like, because the Brooklyn crowd shit on the long match last week, they tried to do the opposite here but this didn't work either. Give us something to care about and stop shoving it down our throats that this is a DIVAS REVOLUTION. If you tell us that all of the time, it's not organic. Anyway, it would have been interesting if Sasha beat Paige here and, by virtue of her win over NIkki, made the upcoming title match a triple threat match. Also, Paige seemed frustrated and may eventually turn on her team.

I was expecting the Dudley Boyz to take on the New Day at a PPV, but it happened here. At least it was non-title, but it seems like a waste to give it away here. New Day cut another fantastic promo before the match, talking about how they want to save the tables. They even bring out the "last" table in the arena and it's in bubble wrap. Also, Xavier Woods has his hair out and it's glorious. The match itself was fun because the Dudleys are the Dudleys and everything New Day touches turns to gold. The Dudleys win and after the match, the Dudleys try to break the table but New Day escapes. The Prime Time Players were on commentary, making me believe we get a triple threat at the Night of Champions.

Seth Rollins came out to close the show and call out Sting. He mentions that he is just as good as Triple H, which brings out Stephanie. Sure, why not make yet another angle about Stephanie and Triple H? She is all pissed because the top guy thinks he's as good as her husband. Seth makes a good point and says that when Triple H was on top, he believed he was as good as Ric Flair. That shuts Steph up and again, instead of Sting, we get John Cena. He cuts the typical Cena promo where he calls his opponent all sorts of juvenile names, making him look bad. In the end, it's going to be Cena vs. Seth at NOC for the US Title, so Seth will pull double duty. Sting then finally appeared...to appear atop the stage and pose with Cena. Man, this episode of Raw sucked hard. The only thing that really stuck out as good to me was the Cesaro/Owens match, how good they made Strowman look and the New Day antics. Other than that, things were either bad (Ryback/Show, the Lana/Ziggler/Rusev/Summer angle) or straight up disappointing (Sting's stuff, the Beat the Clock). 2.5/10.

Fave Five 8/24/15-8/30/15

1) Zack Sabre Jr.: For a while now, I've heard a ton about Zack Sabre Jr. However, I haven't been able to see as much of him as I'd like. I did see his two matches with Roderick Strong this year and both were phenomenal. This weekend, Sabre won PWG's Battle of Los Angeles, defeating talents such as Ricochet, the awesome Pentagon Jr. and Marty Scurll before moving onto the finals where he then bested Chris Hero and "Speedball" Mike Bailey. As I said earlier, I haven't seen much from Sabre or PWG, but from what I've read, both Hero and Bailey have had great years for the company as well, so it was three great guys to have in the end. Sabre winning allows him to top the list this week and I could honestly see him being the guy to defeat Roderick Strong in their rubber match and win the PWG Championship. I also do realize that the image I used of him is from Evolve, but I was pressed for time.

2) The Dudley Boyz: While I'd consider most of Raw to be a fun show, it was the first hour that stole the show. The highlight, after New Day's trombone led rendition of "New York, New York", was the return of the Dudley Boyz. Bubba Ray and D-Von returned, beat up the Tag Team Champions, put Xavier Woods through a table and then went face to face with the former champions, the Prime Time Players. Adding to that, they went and won their return match against the Ascension on Smackdown. Not only was it amazing that they managed to keep this as a surprise in this day and age, but the return is a shot in the arm to the tag team division and the Dudley are not guys that are far past their prime, putting on good performances in recent years.

3) Sting: Even with the return of the Dudley Boyz, Sting appearing on Raw may have been the biggest news of the week. Without many major accomplishments or performances this week, I can put a guy like Sting here. To close out Raw, Sting made his return for the first time since WrestleMania season and targeted Seth Rollins. It was then announced on the WWE Network that Seth demanded a match with Sting at Night of Champions. Granted, I think the idea of Sting losing to Triple H at Mania, shaking his hand and then coming out just to get a shot isn't the best move, but I'm excited to see Seth face Sting and it should be a ton of fun.

            4) The New Day: People really need to understand just how entertained I am by the New Day each week. They've quickly gone from being just another tag team early in their run, to being must see television. The new two time Tag Team Champions successfully defeated the Lucha Dragons on Raw, after a phenomenal entrance that featured Xavier Woods playing the trombone, Big E and Kofi Kingston parodying "New York, New York", and the words "fleek" and "booty." They are magnificent. Then, they were involved in a high profile moment with the Dudley Boyz that has been talked about by pretty much everyone. To continue their run, they were again comical on Smackdown with #GiveTablesaChance and Booty signs to protest the return of the Dudleys. Also, if you haven't seen it yet, check out their interview with Michael Cole from wwe.com or the YouTube page. Comedy gold.

5) Jax Dane: Here we have a guy that I know next to nothing about, but he has to make the list because of his accomplishment this week. Jax Dane was able to wrestle the NWA Heavyweight Title from Hiroyoshi Tenzan. I saw Tenzen compete in the G1 Climax this year and he tried, but was pretty banged up and it affected his performances. Considering this, I think it makes sense to move the title to someone healthy. Judging by some research that I've done, he's had tons of success in NWA since debuting in 2012, winning the NWA Tag Team, North American and National Titles before his win of the big one. Granted, the NWA Title isn't as prestigious as it once was, but this is still a win worthy of making the list.

Raw History: Episodes 9-10

Raw History

Episode #9

March 15th, 1993 | Mid-Hudson Civic Center in Poughkeepsie, New York

So Monday Night Raw leaves the Manhattan Center for the very first time. They don’t go far as they’re still in New York, but in Poughkeepsie. Commentary is Bobby Heenan, Gorilla Monsoon and Rob Bartlett dressed as Vince McMahon. I fully expect Bartlett to annoy me but I absolutely adore the tandem of Heenan and Monsoon. The real Vince and Macho Man are accepting some award somewhere so they aren’t here.

Razor Ramon vs. Russ Greenberg
Russ Greenberg gets tossed around and hit with a fallaway slam before applying the abdominal stretch. Razor loved that move for some reason. It’s clear in this match that Razor is starting to become popular, which would lead to his face run soon. Razor ends it with the Razor’s Edge.

Winner: Razor Ramon in 3:02
Your basic good old fashioned squash. Razor looked good and had the crowd behind him. SQUASH

LA Gore vs. Typhoon
LA Gore looks absolutely ridiculous. Not only is he in strange ring gear, but he has a full mullet and mustache. He applies a headlock and smiles like it’s his first offensive maneuver. Bartlett is BEYOND annoying as Vince McMahon right now. Typhoon squashes Gore, literally, and wins.

Winner: Typhoon in 2:57
Another total squash. SQUASH

Bobby Heenan is in the ring as he is set to interview Harvey Whippleman and the Giant Gonzalez. Whippleman, I think I’m spelling that right, hypes up Gonzalez as a viable threat to The Undertaker at WrestleMania. Sure he is Harvey.

We then cut to a WrestleMania promo that totally hypes up Hulk Hogan over the WWF Title match. Not surprising at all.

Bob Backlund vs. Papa Shango
Two guys I don’t care about at all. Backlund works the arm at the start as Bartlett has reached all new levels of annoying. How Heenan and Gorilla had the strength to not knock him out is beyond me. I can’t even focus on the match and nether can commentary as Gorilla had to shout “STOP” at Bartlett. Shango uses the ropes for leverage on a rest hold and now I’m distracted by Mike Chioda’s mullet. Despite being dominated for the entire match, Backlund uses a small package to earn the win.

Winner: Bob Backlund in 6:58
From what I saw, this was your basic match. The crowd wasn’t that into it and neither guy did anything special. It was hard to concentrate due to the AWFUL commentary from Bartlett. *

The WrestleMania Report is brought to us by Gene Okerlund, who informs us that WrestleMania IX will be the “World’s Biggest Toga Party.” We get promos from Money Inc. and The Undertaker.

The Headshrinkers vs. The Nasty Boys
I have no idea where Afa is. The Nasty Boys and Headshrinkers trade double team work in the early stages. For not being the best workers, the Nast Boys have great chemistry and play to their strengths. The Headshrinkers end up in control, working over Saggs until a missed headbutt from Samu allows Knobbs to get the hot tag. He comes in on fire and takes down both opponents. DOUBLE NOGGIN KNOCKER! Things spill outside and all four guys brawl to the concession area. Fatu and Knobbs throw food on each other as the bell rings.

Double Countout in 9:01
Much like the Backlund/Shango match, this was basic stuff. The brawl to end was fun though. *3/4

Overall: 1/10; Poop. This episode totally blew. Nothing about it was good or relevant. Razor hasn’t even been booked for WrestleMania but got a squash. Typhoon is going nowhere, yet got a squash. Backlund/Shango was boring and the main event also has no relevance on WrestleMania. Bartlett was BEYOND TERRIBLE on commentary, the matches weren’t good and didn’t build towards WrestleMania at all.

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Raw History

Episode #10

March 22nd, 1993 | Manhattan Center in Manhattan, New York

We return to the Manhattan Center with hopes that Raw can bounce back from its worst episode so far. An interesting note is that this episode clocks in at only 36 minutes, which is about ten minutes shorter than usual. Commentary is back to Vince McMahon, Macho Man and Rob Bartlett.

The Bushwackers vs. Damien Demento and Repo Man
The Bushwackers take a while to appear and it’s because they are up on the second deck of the crowd with the fans. It’s pretty cool but I have no clue how they were allowed to lick fans. Trademark Bushwackers shenanigans are in order with biting and taunting. Repo Man is in terrible shape. Demento and Repo Man work the heel stuff by distracting the ref and getting in cheap shots. Butch gets the mild tag and comes in to hit a DOUBLE NOGGIN KNOCKER! Things are awkward for a bit until the Bushwackers win.

Winners: The Bushwackers in 5:28
Dull and odd. The Bushwackers have terrible offense and Repo Man and Demento were not a real team so they had no chemistry. The heels seemed to mail it in too. DUD

Reno Riggins vs. Tatanka
Finally, a match that actually involves someone doing something at WrestleMania. Reno Riggins is wearing cheetah print trunks, white boots and no knee pads. It looks ridiculous. He locks in a sleeper hold but Tatanka breaks it quickly and chops him a bunch. A big powerslam and all Tatanka offense ends this.

Winner: Tatanka in 3:30
Basically all Tatanka. SQUASH

A short tribute to Andre the Giant is shown as he is going to be the first inductee into the WWF Hall of Fame.

Non-Title Match
Jess and John Armstrong vs. WWF Tag Team Champions Money Inc.
Are John and Jess members of the famous Armstrong wrestling family? No. I don’t expect this to last long. Bartlett has a second, smaller monitor and is flipping through channels to laugh at the “competition”. Money Inc. is dominating as one would expect. The Armstrongs have the jobber look down perfectly. IRS gets the pin in short time.

Winners: WWF Tag Team Champions Money Inc. in 3:02
Another squash, but just like the Tatanka one, at least it involved people heading to WrestleMania. SQUASH

WrestleMania Report time and it’s brought to us by ICOPRO. YOU GOTTA WANT IT! No new news is given out here.

Doink vs. Kamala w/ Slick
Kamala not using Slick’s “Jive Soul Bro” theme is a travesty. Doink has a gift with him but it’s just for distraction. His green wig is more of a straight afro tonight and he quickly applies a submission. It’s awesome how methodical Doink was. He continues to work Kamala with slow holds for a while. Kamala chases Doink outside, who offers him the gift. Kamala opens the empty gift but the distraction allowed Doink to get in and win via Countout.

Winner via Countout: Doink in 5:59
The best match of the night but that’s not saying much. Doink is damn good but this wasn’t special. *3/4

Doink tries to attack Kamala with a chair after the match but is outsmarted and chased by the Ugandan Giant. After they leave, the fat ring girls are by commentary and one makes out with Rob Bartlett. Yuck. They hype up “The March to WrestleMania” this Sunday, which has a better card than most episodes of Raw. Macho Man vs. Yokozuna and The Undertaker vs. Bam Bam Bigelow. 

Overall: 3.5/10; Not Good. It’s a step up from the previous week but it’s still not good. While the squashes made sense this week, it still wasn’t good wrestling. The opener was awful and, while the main event was decent, it wasn’t enough to save this show. I guess there is no Raw next week as episode 11 aired on 4/5/93 and WrestleMania is on 4/4, which means that WrestleMania IX is next!

ROH Field of Honor Review

ROH Field of Honor
August 22nd, 2015 | MCU Park in Brooklyn, New York | Attendance: 2,200

This is definitely one of the more interesting settings I’ve ever seen for a Ring of Honor show, taking place outdoors at a baseball stadium, the home of the Brooklyn Cyclones. The first shot we get is Taeler Hendrix throwing out some kind of first pitch to Steve Corino, who is dressed as a cow. 

Side note, this will be more of a recap than a play-by-play review.

Adam Cole def. Christopher Daniels in 11:37
For some reason, Christopher Daniels is dressed as a general. The Kingdom’s theme rules. Daniels doesn’t follow the code of honor, so Adam Cole kicks his ass in a hot start. Daniels wisely targets Cole’s recently injured left shoulder, giving us the story for the match. It’s really well done work that looks vicious at times. Steve Corino, in his cow outfit, spends the duration of the match making some cow based puns and is highly entertaining. My favorite spot probably comes as Cole kicks out of a move, only for Daniels to turn it right into a Koji Clutch. I’ve always loved how seamless Daniels’ offense can be. Cole starts the comeback, which works well because he’s so over. He hits a German suplex and shining wizards for two before applying a figure four. Out comes Chris Sabin, but his distraction backfires as he eats a superkick. Cole won with a Brainbuster onto the knee, which is a sweet finish. This worked very well as an opener. It got the crowd excited, didn’t overdo anything, smartly played into Adam Cole’s shoulder injury and the right guy went over. I suspect Cole is going to be Jay Lethal’s challenger for the ROH World Title at Final Battle, so all singles wins for him are good. I could be wrong though. ***½

War Machine def. The Killer Elite Squad in 10:05
Davey Boy Smith Jr. and Lance Archer was the Killer Elite Squad and they are the reigning GHC Tag Team Champions. There is no code of honor and the teams instead brawl. I like that Davey Boy Smith Jr. has done his best to add some MMA stuff to his offense. As a corner bronco buster is missed, Steve Corino steals the show with a line of “that will hurt your lower ding ding.” Commentary sells that War Machine is a hot commodity because NJPW and Pro Wrestling NOAH are both negotiating with them. That’s a good way to put them over. We get some classic tag formula that works well. K.E.S. nearly win a few times, which I think a lot of people expected considering they hold the gold. War Machine survives and hits Fallout to win. A good tag team match here. War Machine brings something different, due to their size, than the rest of the ROH tag team division. The Killer Elite Squad is a good team for them to have a badass match with, which is what we got here. ***

Judging by the post-match interaction between the teams, War Machine shouts that they are coming to NOAH and want a shot at the GHC Tag Team Titles.

Watanabe wins a Gauntlet Match for a shot at the ROH World TV Title in 24:53
The two guys to get the unlucky draw and start are Adam Page and Dalton Castle. Page cuts a promo on Jay Briscoe again beforehand. Castle is insanely over. His antics are the highlight of this first battle for sure. Page does a good job of drawing heat by mocking Castle. Their battle is really good as the crowd is into everything and there are some good near falls. Castle advances, but Page attacks him, making him easy picking for Frankie Kazarian. Even with Dalton down, Chris Sabin cheats for Kazarian. Castle is able to reverse a victory roll and beat Kazarian. Kazarian and Sabin then attack Castle. Poor guy. Next up is Silas Young, who is in a feud with Castle. He runs out to cover but Castle kicks out. He hits his finisher to get rid of him. Out now is Bushwhacker Luke. That is not a typo. He is knocked out of the ring and then just does his Bushwhacker walk around the bases with a huge grin. “You still got it” chants make me laugh as he is counted out. MOOSE! MOOSE! For being so new to the business, Moose is pretty damn good. He puts down Silas to advance. Truth Martini’s Donovan Dijak is next out. They do a good job in playing up that the big Dijak is a threat to Moose. Both of them get to showcase how agile they are for being their size. After the managers chase each other to the back, Moose puts him down. Cedric Alexander is next, but instead, we just get Veda Scott. Cedric sneaks in while she distracts and lay out Moose with the wrench again to eliminate him. Watanabe is out now. I must again praise commentary as they mention Alexander having won a gauntlet match previously. After a good back and forth, Moose appears again, which distracts Cedric. Shortly after, Watanabe picks up the win to Veda’s dismay. I honestly can’t think of a way that this could have been booked better. Page and Dalton was a good match but everything after made sense. They advanced programs (Dalton/Young and Cedric/Moose), while keeping everyone strong. The winner may have been a bit of a surprise too, which is cool. ***½ 

ACH, Matt Sydal and the Young Bucks def. The Kingdom and Roppongi Vice in 14:38
Matt Taven takes Steve Corino’s cow head and humps it. I’ve never enjoyed the work of the Young Bucks, so I may be mixed on this. As you should expect, this is very fast paced. While I’ve commended Steve Corino and commentary throughout the night, every single time he shouts SUPERKICK PARTY, I die a little inside. ACH steals the show by jumping over Maria on the apron with a ridiculous dive outside. Another rather fun spot sees Roppongi run the bases before hitting a knee on Sydal. The Kingdom try it but it leads to the most obvious of superkicks. The match ends after a ton of high spots. The Bucks hit More Bang for your Buck, followed by an ACH 450 splash and Sydal’s Shooting Star Press. It was a giant spotfest, and those can definitely be fun. However, I feel like each time I see the Young Bucks, I dislike them more and more. Anyway, outside of the running the bases stuff, this was pretty much every Bucks/RPG Vice like spotfest that you get. Fun, but nothing groundbreaking. ***

Hirooki Goto def. Michael Elgin in 12:42
During the G1 Climax, these two had a really good match and I hope for more of the same here. Goto’s theme is one of my favorites. Similar to that match, this is just two badass dudes hammering away on each other in a fun manner. Elgin is a very polarizing figure but he got super over in New Japan, doing things like his major stalling suplex, which he does for more than thirty seconds here. In a fun contrast to the G1 match, Goto got in more of the offense here. Probably a good way to get him more over in the States, like how Elgin got more in the G1 to get him more over with Japan. They built to a good finish, with both guys getting in some higher impact moves as time went on. Goto wins clean with the Shouten Kai. A strong ROH debut for Hirooki Goto. While both of their matches have been good, and were on about the same level, neither has wowed me. Still though, Michael Elgin seems to be rejuvenated and it’s leading to some of the best work of his career. I honestly found the result to be a surprise since Goto beat him in the G1. I figure Elgin would win here and set up an Intercontinental Title match down the line. Still, a good old fashioned hard hitting battle. ***½ 

The Briscoes def. The Time Splitters in 16:07
More New Japan gold here as KUSHIDA is the reigning IWGP Jr. Heavyweight Champion. Alex Shelley and his old partner, Chris Sabin, had some of my favorite tag team matches ever against the Briscoes back in 2008, so I’m looking forward to this. I like this starting with the Briscoes being the aggressive guys and the Time Splitters using their incredibly quickness. At one point early on, Shelley has his two front teeth knocked out. ROH would pay for them to be fixed, which was cool of them. KUSHIDA does the hoverboard lock, which gets a major pop but doesn’t stay applied for long. Jay is able to win it with the Jay Driller. All in all, this wasn’t on the level of those old Briscoes/MCMG matches but I didn’t expect it to. The Briscoes did a good job in the role of hard hitting team, while the Time Splitters were good as the fast paced guys. Alex Shelley deserves credit for his efforts with the broken teeth. It started a bit slow, but really picked up once the Time Splitters got going. ***¾
Kazuchika Okada def. Roderick Strong in 17:23
Kazuchika Okada is the current IWGP Heavyweight Champion. This is Mr. ROH against arguably the top dog in NJPW, outside of Hiroshi Tanahashi. This starts off rather slow, but in a good way as Roderick Strong wants to dictate the pace. When they go outside, he hits a back suplex onto the guardrail, channeling his heel persona from PWG. Roddy does a good job throughout in using the entire environment with his offense. Roderick Strong did a great job in having the Rainmaker scouted, managing to avoid and counter it several times. One of them leads to a sick kick for a very close near fall. It takes two Tombstones but the Rainmaker is yet again countered. After nearly four attempts, the Rainmaker finally puts down Strong. A great battle between two of the very best in the world. Roderick Strong dominated at points, playing the guy that was doing any and everything to try and win to earn a future title shot. Strong showing heel tendencies was definitely interesting as I usually prefer Okada to play that role. Commentary hypes that Strong could be in line for a future shot anyway. I like him having the Rainmaker scouted and that it took so very long to finally hit it. Very smart stuff. ****

Jay Lethal and Shinsuke Nakamura def. reDRagon in 21:28
The crowd absolutely loves Shinsuke Nakamura. The contrasting personalities of Jay Lethal and Nakamura makes for an interesting dynamic early. Lethal is a dick to him, so Nakamura doesn’t tag and lets reDRagon kick his ass for a bit. Hilariously, Nakamura makes up for this by offering Lethal a hug. Following that, the oddball pairing start working better as a unit. They made sure to showcase that Kyle O’Reilly is a viable threat to Lethal considering his upcoming title shot. Truth Martini tries to get Nakamura to cheat but he declines, throwing the book to the pitcher’s mound. Nakamura then counters Kyle’s rebound lariat into his gorgeous armbar. Lethal nails the Lethal Injection on Fish to win. Fun is the best word to describe this match. The dysfunction between Jay Lethal and Shinsuke Nakamura was highly entertaining and, considering they are two of the best singles wrestlers in the world against, in my opinion, the best tag team in the world, this delivered. Awesome match that sets the stage for All-Star Extravaganza and maybe even a future Nakamura/Lethal match. ****

After the match, Shinsuke Nakamura shakes hands with reDRagon and goes to do the same with Jay Lethal, but Lethal disrespects him by declining and walking off.

8.5/10. All in all, I feel like this was a great show. Nothing on the entire card was bad and I gave everything at least three stars. That’s impressive. The final two matches are the best but there is seriously nothing really worthy of skipping. It’s one of the easiest shows I’ve watched all year and would only be slightly behind TakeOver as the best show from the big wrestling weekend of the summer.

Raw History: Episodes 7-8

Raw History
Episode #7
March 1st, 1993 – Manhattan Center in Manhattan, New York

Tonight's show opens with Bret Hart's theme as he comes out to defend the WWF Title against Fatu. Makes sense that the constantly defending champion would put the belt on the line for his first ever Raw match. Commentary is the usual Vince McMahon, Macho Man and Rob Bartlett. Bartlett is dressed as Elvis and it sucks.

WWF Championship
Bret Hart (c) vs. Fatu w/ Afa
Bret Hart starts with a headlock, eats a scoop slam and then fires back with an arm drag. Bret does some arm work and I'd just like to point out that I loved how Bret would give everyone a shot at the title. Fatu hits a superkick from out of nowhere to earn a near fall and a pop from the crowd. Vlad the Superfan is in the front row, which is always cool. Bret counters a hip toss but Fatu blocks his and clotheslines him down. He applies the dreaded nerve hold, which is a move I hate. It looks like it does nothing. As Fatu picks up a near fall, Samu stalks his way to ringside. Bret hits a cross body but is knocked outside. Afa distracts the official as Samu slams Bret on the mat. Fatu works Bret's back for a while and even throws in a signature Samoan headbutt for good measure. Fatu hits a piledriver, which is awesome to see considering the fact that it's now banned but it's only good for two. Bartlett is pretty unbearable on commentary but Vince calls a side slam a suplex and takes the cake for tonight. A second rope headbutt only gets Fatu another near fall. He goes for another one but Bret meets him and hits a second rope suplex for two. Bret hits his perfect backbreaker and applies the Sharpshooter but we get shenanigans from the Headshrinkers who interfere and switch out. The switch does nothing as Samu gets a near fall and brings Fatu back in. Bret knocks Fatu into Samu, who gets his head stuck in the ropes and knocks Afa off the apron. The Sharpshooter is locked in and Fatu gives up.

Winner and Still WWF Champion: Bret Hart in 15:06
Back to back shows with fifteen minute matches? Me like. This was great as Bret Hart looked golden and he made Fatu look better than he's ever looked, even during his Rikishi run. ***1/2

Mean Gene brings us to the WrestleMania Report. He announces that Money Inc. will defend the Tag Team Titles against the Mega Maniacs before running through the card that we already know of. Oh, The Narcissist vs. Mr. Perfect is added.

Vince McMahon interviews Crush, who is flabby as hell and apparently was just swimming in the ocean. He speaks in his terrible Hawaiian accent before crushing a coconut because that's what he's going to do to Doink at WrestleMania.

Doink the Clown vs. Koko B. Ware
Vince McMahon calls Koko a young man, which has to be wrong since he's been in WWF since like 1985. Doink attacks before the bell and Bartlett makes his first funny remark by saying he loved Koko on Different Strokes. Doink applies a much better STF than John Cena has ever done but breaks it. He then seems amused by how baggy Koko's pants are before continuing the leg work. He polishes off Koko by making him submit to the Stump Puller.

Winner: Doink the Clown in 1:48
Just used to get Doink over. I enjoyed the leg work even though it was short. SQUASH

Rob “Elvis” Bartlett interviews Doink, who has a gift, after the match. Rob asks for what's in the box, Doink gives him a small pie before hitting him in the face with a big one.

After commercials, Vince McMahon is in the ring awaiting the arrival of the WWF Tag Team Champions, Money Inc. Ted Dibiase talks about some rich dude making $700,000 a year in retirement and saying it was too cheap. He gets down to business, calling Jimmy Hart an overpaid gopher and they promote WrestleMania a bit. IRS also calls his briefcase the beef case. It's strange but I guess a guy who fathered Bo Dallas and Bray Wyatt has to be a bit odd.

“The Narcissist” Lex Luger vs. PJ Walker
For the uninitiated, PJ Walker is the future Justin Credible of ECW fame. Luger throws him into the corner hard as Vince McMahon goes to a phone conversation with Bobby Heenan. Luger hits a rib breaker as Vince McMahon continues to push this ANNOYING Elvis/Bartlett stuff. After hitting the forearm, Luger pins Walker with his pinky.

Winner: Lex Luger in 2:59
All Luger. Another squash, but in this day and age, it made sense. SQUASH

Post-match, Lex Luger throws PJ Walker out of the ring and calls him a typical male. He berates him before knocking him out again.

Duane Gill and someone vs. The Steiner Brothers
I did not hear the name of Duane Gill's partner, but they both have ridiculous hair. Black on the sides with blonde mullets over. Fantastic. Before the bell, Vince calls them Scott and Rob Steiner. Scott hits a belly to belly on Duane's partner before tagging in his lesser brother. Rick clotheslines no name outside and then runs around the ring. The Steiners allow Duane to get tagged in because they know they got this. Rick hits a backbreaker and laughs before tagging Scott who tosses Duane around. THIS WOULDNT HAPPEN IF HE WAS GILLBERG DAMMIT! The crowd is red hot for the Frankensteiner and he nails it. It looked weak as hell, but was enough to get the job done.

Winners: The Steiner Brothers in 4:43
A third straight squash and the Steiners looked really good. SQUASH

Overall: 6/10; Average. I wanted to like this episode so much more. The squashes were what they were, which is fine but the gem here is Bret Hart vs. Fatu. A really good contest and second to only Ric Flair/Mr. Perfect for best Raw match so far. The Elvis stuff made the show unbearable at points though.

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Raw History
Episode #8
March 8th, 1993 – Manhattan Center in Manhattan, New York

A pre-taped promo from the Mega-Maniacs airs where Hulk Hogan talks about Humpty Dumpty. It actually has to do with them accepting the challenge of Money Inc. for WrestleMania IX. Hogan also sings and steals the Saturday Night Live opening while Beefcake looks awkward and tries to mimic Hogan’s words. It’s odd. Commentary is the usual combination of Vince McMahon, Rob Bartlett and Macho Man.

Non-Title Match
El Matador and Virgil vs. Money Inc.
Tito Santana was cool in his prime, but man I never liked anything at all about Virgil. Ted Dibiase clearly reminds Virgil about his past as his bitch basically. When Virgil gets the tag, Bartlett says that he and Montel Williams are the same person, making it two straight weeks where he’s said something comical. This is the definition of two teams going through the motions and having a basic tag team match. Virgil applies a wrist lock and IRS has the balls to try a nip up and fails miserably. This gets a commercial break for some reason as El Matador plays face in peril. Virgil gets the hot tag, which is a sentence that should never be the case. Thanks to a trip from Dibiase, IRS nails a suplex that is enough to beat Virgil.

Winners: Money Inc. in 8:02
This was incredibly basic. It wasn’t bad and it wasn’t terrible but nothing of note happened here. *3/4

After a clip of Tatanka pinning Shawn Michaels last week is shown, Rick Martel comes out to switched places with the ring girl. I won’t lie, I laughed really hard at this.

Phil Apollo vs. Tatanka
They start by blocking each other’s hip tosses until Tatanka does one that takes Apollo over and out. Apollo has the tiniest lightning bolt on his trunks and I had to point it out because it looks ridiculous. Shawn Michaels calls in to commentary and badmouths Tatanka. It sounds awkward and he stumbles through it. Can you believe this guy would become arguably the greatest of all time? Tatanka rallies and hits some Tomahawk Chops before a Samoan Drop to end it. Why the hell is a Native American doing a Samoan Drop?

Winner: Tatanka in 2:42
Literally all Tatanka. SQUASH

Mean Gene takes us to the WrestleMania Report and, because it’s Hulk Hogan, they’re billing WrestleMania as a “Double Main Event”. Sure. We also get a Bret Hart promo in there about being the underdog and one from Mr. Fuji about Yokozuna. 

Mike Edwards vs. Papa Shango
I’ll give you three guesses on how this one ends guys. The future Kama/Godfather pretty much manhandles Mike Edwards here. Edwards is a hairy man. Like only behind Albert and that dude from Los Boricuas. Shango could’ve won but chose to lift Edwards for more damage. He could’ve won with a second back suplex but decides against it again. He finally chooses to end it, thankfully.

Winner: Papa Shango in 2:31
Another complete squash. I don’t really get this one though since Papa Shango wasn’t going anywhere. This could’ve been used to showcase the Headshrinkers since they’re set to face the Steiner Brothers at WrestleMania. SQUASH

Bob Backlund vs. Tony Demoro
Vince McMahon says that Bob Backlund is on a hot streak but it must be on Superstars since all I’ve seen of him is how he lasted an hour in the Royal Rumble. They stall a bunch as Backlund offers a handshake and then the crowd actually starts to chant for him after he takes down Demoro. This is boring. I guess they’re trying to showcase how Backlund knows some amateur wrestling. He hits a double underhook suplex and chooses to pin Demoro in an odd way.

Winner: Bob Backlund in 3:51
Dull. Yes, it was a squash but it was a terribly boring one. SQUASH

Rob Bartlett interviews Rick Martel who runs him down for his ridiculous attire and brags about being a model. 

Mr. Perfect vs. Rick Martel
Two good workers should put on a good main event here. They feel each other out in the early goings and Rick Martel wants to make sure he doesn’t get hit in the face. Martel also dodges a move, does a cartwheel and some jumping jacks. Perfect dodges a move with a cartwheel too, which was cool. Martel and his gut start to focus on the arm to wear down Perfect. Martel uses a gut wrench suplex for two and I don’t see nearly as much of that move as I’d like. A camel clutch is applied and the crowd attempts to rally Perfect. He fights out of it but Martel stays in control until Perfect blocks a double axe handle. He follows with two atomic drops and THE STRAPS ARE DOWN! They go to commercial and Perfect wins during the break.

Winner: Mr. Perfect in 7:57
Decent match but I hate that the ending happened during the break. I get the whole “anything can happen” thing but it still sucks. **1/4

Mr. Perfect brings out two girls that Rick Martel was rude to earlier in the night and celebrates with them in the ring. We are then told that next week Kamala will be in action as well as Razor Ramon! Plus, Typhoon vs. Bam Bam Bigelow! 

Overall: 2/10; Terrible. Not the strongest episode. You had three squash matches and then two matches that weren’t very good. It didn’t even build towards WrestleMania well. This had the feeling of a show that the WWF just threw together. My least favorite episode of Raw so far.