WWE Raw 12/19/16 Review

WWE Raw
December 19th, 2016 | Jerome Schottenstein Center in Columbus, Ohio

We’re 24 hours removed from Roadblock.

Chris Jericho and Kevin Owens started the show off in the ring. Owens called it the “Chris and Kevin Show” before they showed still images of their plan from last night. Jericho said that he had to make everyone believe that the friendship was truly over. He then gave Owens the “Hug of Jericho. Bring it in maaaaan.” Jericho said Santa Claus stole his gimmick by giving gifts and making lists, so he put him on the list and called him a stupid idiot. Mick Foley interrupted and showed footage of Seth and Roman beating up Chris and Kevin after the match. Jericho dissed Foley’s jacket, so he removed it and revealed an even worse shirt. He booked Chris and Kevin against Roman and Seth tonight before going for a cheap pop by saying they were in Pittsburgh even though they’re in Columbus. Mick pointed to a shark cage above the ring. At the Royal Rumble, Reigns gets a rematch for the Universal Title and Jericho will be in the cage. If Jericho doesn’t do it, he can’t compete in the WWE again. Owens and Jericho dissed Ohio because the cage was built there and Ohio sucks in their mind. Angry Jericho wanted to make sure it was sturdy and got himself locked in the cage. Foley claimed to forget the key and signaled for the cage to go up. The segment ended with Foley saying he would look for the key but Jericho was stuck up there. This was fun until Mick showed up. Then it just got bad.

Jericho was down by end of the commercial and aced like he couldn’t breathe due to how high in the air he was. He has to be given oxygen.

Rusev w/ Lana def. Colin Cassady w/ Enzo Amore via disqualification in 1:01
Rusev and Lana interrupted Cass and Enzo’s intro stuff before they got to S-A-W-F-T. They brawled once the match started but Cass went nuts and wouldn’t stop when Rusev was in the corner, resulting in the DQ. Rusev escaped through the crowd. Not a bad way to continue a feud.

Sasha Banks came out with her knee in a brace and crutch. She got a standing ovation from the commentary team. Sasha gave a somber promo about tapping out twice despite giving her blood, sweat and tears. She said the better woman won and doesn’t feel like a boss anymore. She called Charlotte out so she could congratulate her. Instead of Charlotte, Nia Jax arrived. She called Sasha a weak, wounded little girl. Nia kicked the crutch out before yelling that she was the boss. She tossed Sasha across the ring. Just make Sasha heel again. She’s better at it than Charlotte and isn’t a strong sympathetic babyface.

The new Tag Team Champions Sheamus and Cesaro were shown in Mick Foley’s office. Foley put himself over for making the team before revealing the new Raw Tag Team Titles. They’re like the Smackdown ones. They took the copper belts and made them red and silver. A referee showed up and said that Mick was needed for an emergency. Cut to Braun murdering random people backstage and throwing shit around. Mick tried to stop him by giving him the night off but Braun said Sami only survived 10 minutes because he allowed it. Mick said he gave Sami the night off and a pissed Braun left to cause more havoc.

Cedric Alexander w/ Alicia Fox def. Noam Dar in 5:09
Austin Aries joined commentary. There was some quick action early and we got a commercial. When they returned, we barely saw anything. Cedric did a cool handspring kick and springboard clothesline before winning with the Lumbar Check. Considering they had an actual story to work with, this should have been given more time to make the crowd care. *

Noam Dar congratulated Cedric Alexander after the match but reminded Cedric that he won two weeks ago. You could say they’re even but they aren’t. Dar said they aren’t even because he still wants Alicia.

The New Day came out in a relatively sad mood. Their historic reign hit a road block last night. They said they won’t mourn forever though because in order for Ric Flair to become a sixteen-time champion, he had to lose fifteen times. Big E quipped “That’ll be Charlotte next month.” Loved it. Sheamus and Cesaro came out and each went Team Hell No by saying they were the Tag Team Champions by themselves. The fans booed “Sheamus” but cheered for “Cesaro”. New Day were just upset that Cesaro and Sheamus got new titles while they had to carry those copper belts. Kofi knew someone would beat them and they were glad it was Cesaro. Sheamus thanked them so they shamed him because they were only speaking to Cesaro. Sheamus and Cesaro bickered a bit before Sheamus said they would surpass New Day’s record. Xavier Woods said they sustained themselves on the power of positivity, had tons of shirts released and there was music in the air. This was cut off by the arrival of Gallows and Anderson. They called everyone geeks and nerds. Gallows said they beat up the “Nerd Day” enough to set up the title change. The Shining Stars also showed up and they say everyone should just go on vacation to their resort. Cesaro ripped up the brochure and everyone brawled.

Cesaro, Sheamus and The New Day w/ Xavier Woods def. Karl Anderson, Luke Gallows and the Shining Stars in 10:43
Mick Foley made this match during the break. Epico was first to hit a cool move, busting out an inverted suplex into a rib breaker. They worked through another commercial break with Kofi taking the heat. He nearly made the tag but his teammates all dealt with the other heels. Kofi took the Boot of Doom but kicked out. Big E got the hot tag and ran wild for a bit. Sheamus came in hot as well and did a new double team move with Cesaro but the pin was broken Up. We got a buffet of guys hitting kicks or strikes until Cesaro nailed Anderson with a popup uppercut. He got Epico in the swing before finishing with the Sharpshooter. From what we could see, this was rather fun. The back half was filled with action. **½

They recap the lame Jericho/Owens/Foley segment from earlier.

Backstage, Cass and Enzo were talking. Cass said that Rusev deserved what he got earlier. Enzo apologize for getting him into this but Cass shrugged it off. Someone showed up with a letter for Enzo. He hoped it was from Ed McMahon but when he found out Ed is dead, he hoped it was from Vince. It turned out to be a notice to attend sensitivity training for exposing himself at work a few weeks back.

Neville came out scowling. He got a microphone and talked about destroying Rich Swann and TJ Perkins only to get cheered. He said they only cheered him because they thought he was small and pitied him but he doesn’t want that. They can take their cheers and stick it. Neville said that he plans on obliterating the division. Rich Swann interrupted and wanted to know what happened to Neville. Neville said that he taught him everything he knows but got no gratitude or respect for it. He called himself the king of the cruiserweights. Swann said while he has the title, he’s the best. Brian Kendrick interrupted and wanted to know where the respect was. Kendrick wanted Neville in the division from the start because he’s also a pioneer. They ended up jumping Swann until TJ Perkins showed up only to run right into a kick. Neville did all the work while Kendrick mostly watched. Neville left and Kendrick picked the bones and hit TJ with sliced bread.

Sensitivity training time. Jinder Mahal, Bob Backlund, Darren Young and Bo Dallas were in class too. Enzo made insensitive jokes, including saying Jinder Mahal was spelled S-A-W-F-T before a commercial.

Titus O’Neil vs. Sin Cara ended in a no contest in 0:43
They had an interaction on the pre-show to lead to this. Within ten seconds, BRAUUUUNNN! Strowman came out and beat up both guys. Braun then carried Cara up the stage and dropped him hard when Mick Foley came out. Braun shouted “I TOLD YOU OR ELSE” before throwing Cara off the stage and onto Christmas gifts. This better lead to Braun vs. Cara at WrestleMania dammit.

Backstage, Owens tried to calm Jericho down since he was still feeling the effects of earlier. He said he was afraid of heights and spiders, like his name is R-Truth. Owens talked him up and they said Reigns and Rollins were gonna get it but Jericho then got nervous about the cage again.

Charlotte was out for her monthly “I won the title again, I’m the queen, woo” promo. It was the same promo as always. She’s a guaranteed winner and made Clemson beating Ohio State jokes. Bayley interrupted because this is the only way they can set up Charlotte feuds. Bayley wants the Charlotte/Bayley rivalry to begin now that the Charlotte/Sasha one is mercifully over. Bayley also called Sasha/Charlotte the greatest rivalry in women’s history. Charlotte said that of the four horsewomen, she was always one and Bayley was fourth which is why she didn’t get called up in 2015 with them. Bayley said that isn’t a new insult and wanted to improve to 3-0 against Charlotte right now. Charlotte accepted.

Non-Title Match: Bayley def. Charlotte in 14:37
Charlotte strutted and played the cocky heel a bit. She threw Bayley’s head band into the crowd with a smile. Once Bayley took control, she mocked Charlotte and did her “around the world on your back” spot. During the break, Charlotte took over again. She hit the moonsault but only got two. She continued to talk smack and it cost her when Bayley pulled her into an ugly backslide to win. Nowhere near their best work together. Charlotte’s heat was dull, Bayley’s rallies lacked and the finish was lame. Charlotte’s shoulder was apparently up too. This also does nothing since beating Charlotte on Raw means nothing when she obliterates people on PPVs. You can tell this is setting up for Bayley to take her first loss to Charlotte soon. Also, why book underdog Bayley to beat the champion often? **

The sensitivity training team did role reversal. Young and Backlund did bad impersonations of each other. Enzo’s Jinder impression was “Hi, my name is Jinder and everyone swipes left on Tinder.” He said he was in a band and didn’t play instruments and is still a schmuck after getting fired and re-hired. Jinder said that Enzo had little man syndrome. Enzo wanted to slap him but didn’t because the trainer said it would be insensitive. After a break, everyone go their certificates. Enzo said he didn’t need one because he’s already certified. He hit on the trainer and even said he’d slide in her DMs. Rusev walked in and Enzo said he wasn’t going to end up WORLDSTAR because of him. He went to leave but Jinder was back to stop him. He and Rusev jumped Enzo. They gotta show us how Cass is so superior and better off alone.

We got another Emmalina vignette.

Roman Reigns and Seth Rollins def. Chris Jericho and Kevin Owens via disqualification in 17:05
I won’t lie, Reigns and Rollins teaming up like nothing ever happened between them in the past is irritating. It’s one thing for guys that had a rivalry to do it but Seth broke up the Shield and the minute he turns face, all is forgiven. Anyway, this began as your standard tag match. Owens and Jericho tried to walk away a few minutes in but got brought back by Seth and Roman. After a break, the heels were in control with Seth taking the heat. Roman got the tag and though he was hot, actually took some heat as well. Seth got the hot tag and did his thing. Jericho still got the Walls locked in but Rollins reached the ropes. Reigns hit a Superman punch and it was time for a hot tag to Roman. A random Braun Strowman appeared and pulled Roman off the apron, attacking him and resulting in the DQ. Typical main event for Raw, nothing special. **¾

Braun also took time to powerslam Seth Rollins inside. Owens and Jericho slid Reigns inside to feed him to Braun. Braun said “or else” meant everyone would fall.

Overall: 5/10. I’d say this was a middle of the pack episode of Raw. It didn’t feel like a chore to get through and though none of the matches were memorable, they advanced angles rather well. It was nice to see Neville get promo time and the continued push of Nia and Braun as monsters was welcome. Coming off a PPV and with over a month until another, this did a good job setting things up for the future.

WWE Roadblock: End of the Line Review

WWE Roadblock: End of the Line
December 18th 2016 | PPG Paints Arena in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

I missed this show live to go see Rogue One with my family. After hearing reports about it when I got home, I seem to have made the right choice. I originally wasn’t going to watch the show but for continuity’s sake (I haven’t missed a PPV since 2013), I decided to review it. On the Kickoff show, Rusev beat Big Cass by countout in 4:31 in a match that did nothing for either guy. All it did was set up a rematch for Raw. I hate when PPVs do that. Also, Rusev tricking Cass into a countout just didn’t feel in line with his character. Blah. (¾*).

WWE Raw Tag Team Championship: Cesaro and Sheamus def. The New Day (c) w/ Xavier Woods in 9:58
Like Nikki Bella in 2015, New Day broke a record for longest reign as champions and immediately dropped the titles in their next defense. These guys produced the match I’ve been waiting for them to deliver. Cesaro continued to run wild and just excels in tag teams. Seriously, he’s at his best in this environment. Everyone else produced too, with Big E and Sheamus bringing brute force, Kofi bumping around and even Woods being entertaining on the sidelines. I love that they got just shy of ten minutes because it meant there was no slow down. They went as hard as they could for the time and it clicked. Sheamus was sneaky in the end and rolled up Kofi to end the historic reign. These teams have great chemistry and it all came together here. Someone was finally crafty enough to beat New Day, who gracefully handed the titles to Cesaro and embraced, while Sheamus snatched them and celebrated. (***½)

Braun Strowman and Sami Zayn wrestled to the time limit in 10:00
Since the draft, Braun Strowman has been a pleasant source of entertainment on Raw, while Sami Zayn is always great. Nobody takes a better beating than Sami, so Braun throwing him around for the first half of this match was fine. It was the back half where this shined. Mick Foley came out and teased throwing in the towel in the same town where Undertaker nearly killed him back in 1998. Foley’s interactions with both Strowman and Zayn were great. Sami’s final stand in the closing minutes was the highlight. Braun did the overdone broken guardrail spot and just as time expired, Sami hit the Helluva Kick. The best Braun performance to date. I think they have something better in them because Braun is improving and is a good monster while Sami is the best underdog babyface around. Good storytelling. (***)

Seth Rollins def. Chris Jericho in 17:05
Before the PPV, I noted that this was the perfect stopgap program for Seth Rollins. After the lengthy Owens feud and before the Rumble and HHH Mania build, he and Jericho makes a lot of sense. For the most part, the match was standard. Rollins hit the high spots for the crowd and Jericho nailed the classic heel tactics like raking the eyes or using the official for over. It was fine but didn’t grab me. Jericho’s current run has been magnificent in terms of character work but his matches mostly leave something to be desired (though he’s been awesome in multi-man matches). Kevin Owens showed up but got sent away after an argument with Jericho. Rollins countered the Codebreaker into the Pedigree to win. It felt like a first or second hour main event on Raw rather than a PPV match. (***)

WWE Cruiserweight Championship: Rich Swann (c) def. The Brian Kendrick and TJ Perkins in 6:03
Austin Aries joined commentary for this and just seeing him on an official WWE PPV was cool. Swann being called “outlandish” for no real reason is lame. This suffered from the same issues that other Cruiserweight Title matches have. The action isn’t bad but the crowd doesn’t care and something was just missing. They tried hard and had some cool spots that involved all three men set up. There were a few slip ups throughout that didn’t help either. Swann retained after a kick and I came away disappointed. (**½)

The crowd finally popped when Neville’s theme played and “The Man That Gravity Forgot” made his return to TV for the first time in months. It looked like he would congratulate Swann but instead attacked him. Perkins tried to make the save but also got his ass kicked. The fans chanted “thank you Neville”. A heel Neville is an interesting change, but just adding him to the division is great.

WWE Raw Women’s Championship Ironman Match: Charlotte [3] def. Sasha Banks (c) [2] in 34:47
It is the feud that never ends. It goes on and on my friends. Ironman matches can be hard to properly complete. Sasha and Bayley nailed it last year having a top three Ironman match ever in my opinion. This wasn’t that. With around eleven minutes left, Charlotte got the first fall and Sasha tied it shortly after. Sasha took a 2-1 lead but Charlotte sent it into OT after making Sasha tap with two seconds left. Whoever laid that out is an idiot. Your babyface should the one to overcome the odds and make the comeback. Even if she’s going to lose in the end, if she blows the lead by tapping at the buzzer and then loses the match, she looks like a total chump. Charlotte, the hated heel, not only made the big comeback, but then won in OT. Sasha bled a fair amount from the mouth and tapped to the figure eight again, moving Charlotte to 15-0 in PPV singles matches in 2016. They better have meant it when they said this was the end of the feud. Can we just anyone else in the title program? Bayley? Emma? Nia? Please? I didn’t need these two to go 30+ minutes when their rivalry has already gone on far too long. My least favorite match of theirs ever. The trading of the title and Raw women’s division in general, is a joke. (**¾)

WWE Universal Championship: Kevin Owens (c) def. Roman Reigns via disqualification in 23:33
Kevin Owens as the top champion on a brand could be special. Instead, it has been beyond lackluster on Raw. He’s looked far beneath his challengers during the builds and the matches have been disappointing (though the HIAC and FCA matches with Rollins were good). The crowd was mostly dead for this, which I think was partially because the build has been shit and partially because they just watched a 35-minute match. There are times when a match goes for a while and it feels like they’re just killing time. That was this. It was a twenty minute match that felt like a forty minute one. You just knew that Chris Jericho had to get involved, so there was no suspense before that. Once he did show up, he hit Owens with the Codebreaker, resulting in the DQ. Bland stuff here. It felt like a house show match with a Raw finish. (*¾)

Post-match, Jericho gave the title to Owens and they celebrated. You see, it was all a set up. Swerve, bro. Seth Rollins ran out because the heels aren’t allowed to ever look strong or come out on top. He and Reigns Shield powerbombed both Owens and Jericho through the announce tables.

Overall: 4.5/10. Coming into this show, Fastlane and Clash of Champions were my picks for worst WWE Pay-Per-View of 2016. This took that dubious honor. The Kickoff match was bad, but the show started off rather well. The Tag Title match ruled, Braun/Sami told a good story and Rollins/Jericho was solid. The show fell hard after that. The Cruiserweight Title match was decent at best and the booking of the final two bouts were what we’ve come to expect from Raw. The Ironman match didn’t make sense and the main event felt like a waste of time. The best thing about the show was the Tag Title match and Neville’s return.

Roadblock: End of the Line Predictions

It's kind of annoying that before Enzo Amore and Big Cass can win Tag Team Titles anywhere, we're getting a bunch of looks at solo Cass. They're two guys who should just stick together, especially given the state of Raw's tag team division. Anyway, this feud still suffers from the same issues that the Rusev/Roman Reigns one had. Rusev is just a guy defending the honor of his wife, yet he's somehow the bad guy. I like Enzo and Cass, but I can't boo Rusev. The only heelish thing he's done in all of this was the setup to get Enzo in the hotel room. Rusev should win but it's Raw, so I expect it to go the other way.

Winner: Big Cass

Before writing this, I had no clue there was a ten minute limit on this match. I think there's a lot of potential here. Braun Strowman has been surprisingly good since going solo. His best strength is playing the monster. Sami Zayn just so happens to be the best underdog babyface on the planet. That makes for a stellar combination. I get the sense that the time limit was put into place for a reason and not just for the sake of it. Braun is going to beat Sami's ass but Sami will not give up. He'll kick out and fight for his life until time expires and he proves himself to Mick Foley. Neither guy should really lose right now.

Winner: Time limit draw

This is a rivalry that makes sense. Seth Rollins keeps getting screwed out of the title and at the heart of each screwjob is Chris Jericho. He's coming for his revenge and it works as a good short-term feud before bigger things come WrestleMania season. They should produce a good match and possibly the match of the night. I see a win for Seth to gain momentum heading into the Royal Rumble, where he probably gets screwed by Triple H for calling him out so much.

Winner: Seth Rollins

Remember when Nikki Bella retained the Divas Title against Charlotte so she could break the record, only to drop it to Charlotte a few days later at the PPV? That's what I see happening here. New Day deserved a lengthy reign and setting the record was an awesome moment for them, though they never should have dropped them to the Prime Time Players in 2015 so this record should have been broken about two months ago. Still, they did it but it's time for a change. Cesaro and Sheamus as a team has to have some sort of payoff and I think it's the titles. Honestly, as much as I enjoy them together, they should be singles guys helping the dead US Title division. Imagine that title revolving around guys like Sami, Cesaro, Sheamus, Rusev, Neville and Braun instead of being used as a prop.

Winners: Cesaro and Sheamus

It's the division the fans don't care about! Honestly though, these are three guys that get some of the better reactions. TJ Perkins' overness has fallen for sure, but his pops are still high among the division. The Brian Kendrick is the only legitimately viable heel and Rich Swann almost always gets a good reaction. They have mostly had good matches between them (even if Perkins/Kendricks had a disappointing series). I suspect something good but not great, which is pretty much the standard for the cruiserweights at this point. Swann retains because someone has to have a decently long title reign right?

Winner: Rich Swann

I am on record as a huge Sasha Banks fan. I think that she's the best choice to be champion. But my goodness, I hate this rivalry at this point. Sasha's crowning win back in July felt special. Each title change since then has been less and less special. I don't care if her second win was in a Raw main event or if her third had Ric Flair come out. Instead of making a lengthy feud about them wanting to be the best or about them hating each other, it has just been "LET'S MAKE HISTORY OVER AND OVER". Like John Cena vs. Randy Orton in 2009, the feud has gone on for too long and is going to end in an Ironman match. Oh joy. Sasha should 10000% retain here (but I'd rather both be out of the title picture at this point) since the money is in Sasha?Bayley at Mania, but I've learned my lesson. Sasha should have won at SummerSlam and especially at Hell in a Cell too. I don't pick against Charlotte or Roman Reigns on PPVs. 

Winner: Charlotte

The WWE Universal Title continues to pump out programs that don't feel like big deals. Smackdown's title picture has revolved around James Ellsworth in recent months and still feels more important. Kevin Owens is consistently seen as a million times inferior to Roman Reigns, so why should anything change here? Sure he could retain by cheating but I don't see it happening. Roman Reigns will win, hold two titles (though the US is a prop at this point) and I will continue to be uninterested in the Universal Title.

Winner: Roman Reigns

2016 Prediction Record: 67-39

2015 Prediction Record: 60-35

Raw History: Episodes 73-75

Raw History
Episode #73
August 1st, 1994 | Beeghly Center in Youngstown, Ohio

The show opens with a recap of the short history between Shawn Michaels and Razor Ramon, including their ladder match at WrestleMania. Vince McMahon is back on commentary for the first time in weeks.

Razor Ramon vs. Shawn Michaels w/ Diesel
A hot start by Razor sends Shawn to the outside. Razor uses his strength, including a fallaway slam, to keep the pressure on HBK. The back and forth is impressive here as neither guy is really allowed to take firm control for any lengthy period. They trade offense and have the crowd completely into them. Razor catapults Shawn over and out onto Diesel. Shawn over does the jump, but it comes off looking fine. Shawn looks to come off the top but Razor slams him down like he’s Ric Flair. Razor continues to try and use his power with a bearhug and abdominal stretch. This has gone through two commercial breaks and is getting a good amount of time. Shawn has turned the tide, using underhanded tactics like a good heel. Shawn wears him down but Razor starts to rally. Both men are down after Razor hits a big kick when Shawn sets too early. They get up and trade blows before Shawn takes his signature corner bump. Shawn goes for the Razor’s Edge but Razor counters with a backdrop. He gets up and calls for a Razor’s Edge of his own but Diesel gets on the apron. He eats some right hands as Shawn grabs the Intercontinental Title. He fails at using it but Razor ends up running into a boot from Diesel behind the official’s back. Shawn rolls up Razor for the 1-2-3.

Winner: Shawn Michaels in 17:59
Shawn gets his win back from WrestleMania and these two have another really good outing. It obviously wasn’t on the level of their Ladder match, but still a good showing. I liked Razor playing the powerhouse, which doesn’t always work for a face, but did so here. Razor probably had better chemistry with HBK than anyone else. ***½

Diesel and Shawn Michaels look to continue the assault after the bell but officials break things up.

Todd Pettengill brings us the SummerSlam Report. He says that Shawn and Diesel should just come out together since they’re working together by the end of the match anyway. That would be good, but Diesel and Shawn already do come out together. We find out that Lex Luger accepted Tatanka’s challenge for SummerSlam.

Non-Title Match
WWF Women’s Champion Alundra Blayze vs. Bull Nakano w/ Luna Vachon
Bull Nakano is just given the old Orient Express theme. Vince does a good job in putting over Nakano as a dominant force in Japan. She proves him right quickly by tossing Alundra around like a rag doll. Macho Man calls her BULL NAKANAKANAKANO for some reason. Nakano hits a big piledriver but Blayze gets her foot on the bottom rope. Nakano follows with a sitout powerbomb for two again. Blayze gets a victory roll near fall before making a mistake and missing high risk. Nakano missing a flying leg drop and kicks out of Alundra’s bridging German. Alundra dropkicks Nakano outside and leaps off onto her. They brawl outside until a double countout is called.

Double countout in 5:25
A fantastic first TV showing for Bull Nakano. She got to show off her power offense, went to a draw with the champion and this sets up a rematch. They showed off moves that you wouldn’t see men bust out in this era, let alone women, while exciting the crowd with close near falls. ***

Next week, Bigelow and IRS take on Doink and Tatanka. I guess not every show can be like this.

It’s time for the King’s Court, but Jerry Lawler goes into the crowd to bash fans. He says that all of Macho Man’s girlfriends are inflatable. Macho Man’s response is “how did he know?” There is a marriage proposal in the crowd and Lawler pulls the woman away to give her time to think. She says yes. Lawler’s guest is the man who says that he never lost the WWF Championship, Bob Backlund. We see footage from a recent show where Bret Hart beat Bob Backlund. Bob slapped Bret and put him in the chicken wing. Bob seems to be on the verge of snapping.

The Smoking Gunns vs. George Anderson and Tom Bennett
Billy and Bart do their double team offense and we actually go to a commercial during this. They win as the show goes off the air.

Winners: The Smoking Gunns in 1:44
It was kept short and that’s how I like it.

Overall: 8.5/10. One of the better episodes of Raw so far. You got a really good match between Razor and HBK, while Bull Nakano and Alundra Blayze had a great five minute showcase. Throw in an important Backlund interview setting up a new top heel and keeping the lame stuff to a short under two minute match and you’ve got a winner.

Raw History
Episode #74
August 8th, 1994 | Beeghly Center in Youngstown, Ohio

Our usual hosts are here this week.

The Undertaker w/ Ted Dibiase vs. Butch Banks
I feel like Butch Banks drew the short straw when it comes to jobber names. Obviously, this is the Underfaker, since the real Undertaker won’t be back until SummerSlam. He wins with a tombstone.

Winner: The Underfaker in 3:07
Totally one-sided, which was fine and how it should have been.

A clip is shown of Leslie Nielsen searching for the real Undertaker. Those ads were really hit or miss.

A recap airs from Superstars when Shawn Michaels had Lex Luger on the Heartbreak Hotel and was trying to goad him into saying that he was now employed by Ted Dibiase. He barely denies it, which continues the speculation. That’s a fine idea, but if Luger was really a straight face, why not just deny it?

Lex Luger vs. Chad Miller
Ted Dibiase shows up to talk to Luger during his entrance. After a break, Dibiase appears on a split screen, saying that he just told Luger not to worry about a thing. Luger goes through his stuff and wins with the loaded forearm.

Winner: Lex Luger in 3:00
As usual, Lex Luger squashes aren’t the most entertaining.

Todd Pettengill and the SummerSlam Report brings us the ENTIRE SummerSlam card. We already know about the Battle of the Undertakers, Luger/Tatanka, the WWF Title Steel Cage match and Diesel defending the Intercontinental Title against Razor Ramon. Razor is gonna have former Chicago Bear Walter Payton in his corner to oppose HBK. Added to the card is a Women’s Title match between Alundra Blayze and Bull Nakano, Mabel vs. Jeff Jarrett because rap vs. country is a thing and lastly, the Headshrinkers will put the Tag Team Titles on the line against IRS and Bigelow.

Bam Bam Bigelow and IRS w/ Ted Dibiase vs. Doink and Tatanka w/ Dink
I do not have high hopes for this one. Doink and IRS start things and Doink keeps the pace quick, while IRS struggles and has to tag out. When the match moves to Bigelow and Tatanka, it ends up improving but still isn’t what I would call great. The heels start to work the heat on Tatanka which surprised me. He’s the guy going into a big PPV match, so I’d assume he’d get the hot tag. That hot tag comes to Doink but it ends up failing as he eats a kick from Bigelow while IRS is the legal man. He hits the Write-Off and they win.

Winners: Bam Bam Bigelow and IRS in 8:00
Outside of Bigelow, I don’t really like any of the other workers in this match. Due to this, I wasn’t a fan. It wasn’t outwardly bad as they followed tag formula fine, but it was pretty dull. *

The winners throw Doink out of the ring and attack Tatanka until Lex Luger runs them off. Ted Dibiase gets in the ring with money and makes an offer to Luger. He shoves the money in Lex’s hand and Tatanka bumps into him. He sees the money and flips out, shouting that Lex sold out.

Next week, Owen Hart takes on the 1-2-3 Kid in a rematch of their excellent King of the Ring bout. Sweet!

King’s Court time with guest Owen Hart, how is accompanied by Jim Neidhart. Owen runs down his family and mentions that Neidhart is the only member that has had his back from the start. He reminds everyone that he humiliated his brother at WrestleMania before winning the King of the Ring. Then Owen flips it and says that the whole family now backs him. Bruce Hart is brought out as the next guest. He was always my least favorite Hart Family member. He says that nobody in the family is behind Owen. He also says that Owen cheated at WrestleMania, which did not happen at all. They bicker and argue into a commercial that ends the segment. It helped build the upcoming WWF Title match but Bruce was pretty bad here.

Bob Backlund vs. Kevin Krueger
Backlund’s style was pretty different from what was going in around this era. He was stuck in the 80’s, but it kind of worked in his insane character during this time. He was just beginning it here and hadn’t cut his hair yet. Every single time he takes his opponent down, he starts leaping around. There are some “boring” chants before a “we want Bret” chant takes over. He wins with the Crossface Chicken Wing.

Winner: Bob Backlund in 3:48
Backlund was kind of entertaining here.

He holds onto the chicken wing for long after the bell and then stares at his own hands.

Overall: 3.5/10. A big downfall from last week but that was expected. Most of this show is an easy skip, especially since the main match wasn’t good, but I did enjoy Backlund and the Owen Hart portion of the King’s Court.

Raw History
Episode #75
August 15th, 1994 | Memorial Auditorium in Lowell, Massachusetts

For weeks, the Tatanka/Luger issue has broiled over and Luger keeps ending up in situations where he looks like he’s joining the Million Dollar Corporation. Macho Man and Vince McMahon are on commentary.

1-2-3 Kid vs. Owen Hart w/ Jim Neidhart
Similar to their King of the Ring match, Owen attacks before the bell, but the Kid is ready. He scores a quick near fall on a spinning heel kick. I don’t know what it is about this episode, maybe it’s the lighting, but it looks better than other recent episodes. Kid blocks some back suplexes and takes Owen to the mat. Owen finally hits one, followed by an enziguri for two. Both guys pick up the pace and kip up at the same time. Kid knocks him outside and follows with a springboard dive. He dropkicks Neidhart’s fat ass off the apron heading into the commercial. Returning, Owen hits a suplex from the apron to the outside and Kid takes the bump like they were actually in the ring, which is sick. Owen now picks the Kid apart, taking joy in playing the bigger guy. Owen makes a crucial mistake, missing a knee drop from the top and starts to limp. Kid goes right after the leg and applies a single leg crab until Neidhart runs in for the DQ.

Winner via disqualification: 1-2-3 Kid in 9:57
A fast paced match that was probably a notch below their King of the Ring encounter. Fun, quick and not the kind of thing we’d see often on Raw in this time period. The finish was pretty lame though. ***

After the match, Jim Neidhart keeps officials at bay while Owen Hart locks the 1-2-3 Kid in the Sharpshooter.

Todd Pettengill and that SummerSlam Report! No new information comes here.

In the crowd, Abe “Knuckleball” Schwartz is on strike. You see, Major League Baseball was on strike at the time and the WWF wanted to take advantage of that. He was played by Steve Lombardi, or the Brooklyn Brawler. In a promo from earlier in the evening, he blamed the fans.

Duke Droese vs. Nick Barberry
This is what you would expect it to be. Barberry gets in like two moves before Droese hits a clothesline and body slam. He shouts “ITS TIME TO TAKE OUT THE TRASH” before winning with an elbow.

Winner: Duke Droese in 1:27
Just how I like my Duke Droese matches; short.

Another Leslie Nielsen vignette is shown, saying he will solve the case at SummerSlam.

Kwang w/ Harvey Wippleman vs. Tony Roy
Kwang attacks, spits the red mist in the air and wins in incredibly quick fashion.

Winner: Kwang in 0:32
Whoa. That was short.

Jerry Lawler and Ted Dibiase are out for the King’s Court. Lawler talks about how Dibiase has been wrongfully questioned about the legitimacy of his Undertaker. Out comes Paul Bearer as Lawler has him as a guest too so Ted can clear the air. Bearer sends a message for Ted’s Undertaker saying that the real Undertaker is going to end him. Out comes the Underfaker. Bearer tells him to his face that at SummerSlam, his eyes will be closed forever. So, basically, the Undertaker is going to murder Brian Lee. As he chokes Bearer, the lights flicker and the crowd loses their minds. They go out and when they come back on after a gong, Bearer is out of the ring and screeching that his Undertaker is here.

Mabel w/ Oscar vs. Raymond Roy
I wonder if the jobber is related to the dude who Kwang killed. Mabel does some different offense like a neck snap but it still isn’t among the most impressive showings. He wins with a second rope elbow

Winner: Mabel in 2:33
Kudos to Mabel for bringing out some new moves.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Scott Taylor
In the Attitude Era, the crowd would have been pretty into this pairing. Jarrett dominates here and wins with a figure four, which I believe is the first time he’s won with that on Raw.

Winner: Jeff Jarrett in 1:58
Hey look, another short squash. That has certainly helped this show move along.

Jeff Jarrett’s celebration is cut short by the arrival of Mabel and Oscar. They rap to show that rap music is better than country.

Overall: 6.5/10. A solid episode here. Owen/Kid was a good showing and the rest of the squash matches were kept short, which is a very good thing. Add in the fact that I was actually entertained by the King’s Court this week for the most part and you’ve got a thumbs up.

Random Network Reviews: Battleground 2013

Battleground 2013
October 6th, 2013 | First Niagara Center in Buffalo, New York | Attendance: 11,700

Entering the fall of 2013, the WWE was in the midst of a WWE Championship controversy. After Daniel Bryan won the belt at SummerSlam, Randy Orton cashed in Money in the Bank on him. Bryan beat Orton for the title at Night of Champions, but there were some fishy circumstances there, so the title entered this show in abeyance. This was the first Battleground Pay-Per-View in history.

Kudos to the opening video package for doing a good job of hyping a card that isn’t very good.

World Heavyweight Championship Hardcore Match
Alberto Del Rio (c) vs. Rob Van Dam w/ Ricardo Rodriguez
The pairing of Ricardo Rodriguez and Rob Van Dam was certainly a strange one. Even Ricardo’s announcement of RVD comes off as a poor version of what he used to do for Del Rio. Commentary mentions that this is the perfect chance for Damien Sandow to cash in Money in the Bank, but he worked the Kickoff show and hurt his knee. The first big spots come from RVD, who hits a moonsault off the guardrail and a DDT on the chair. Well damn, where do you go after the DDT? Both guys get in offense following this until RVD brings a ladder into play. Del Rio is sent into it an RVD follows in with a heel kick. Del Rio comes back with an enziguri. The ladder falls on RVD and Del Rio double stomps it onto him. There’s a point where Del Rio leaps from the top with a garbage can and gets it dropkicked back into himself, but it looks weak because of how Del Rio jumped. You could tell he had no offensive plan. RVD misses Rolling Thunder on a ladder, hurting him greatly. When the champ applies the Cross Armbreaker, Rodriguez attacks with a bucket. Del Rio kicks the hell out of him for it. In a cool spot, RVD does the Five Star Frog Splash from the apron onto a ladder onto Del Rio. The fans clearly chant “we want tables” so when RV grabs a chair, Jerry Lawler says “they’re chanting we want chairs.” Idiot. RVD misses the Van Terminator and Del Rio delivers a big kick of his own. He gets RVD’s arm caught in a chair and stomps on it before applying the Cross Armbreaker with it still wrapped up. RVD submits.

Winner and Still World Heavyweight Champion: Alberto Del Rio 16:01
Okay, well that was better than I remembered or expected. It was mostly just a bunch of spots, but at least the spots are pretty big and brutal, and Alberto Del Rio finishing things with the Cross Armbreaker in the chair was great. ***¼

Zeb Colter and his Real Americans cut a promo backstage on Santino Marella and the Great Khali.

The Great Khali and Santino Marella w/ Hornswoggle vs. The Real Americans w/ Zeb Colter
What is this doing on a Pay-Per-View? Santino plays the comedy role, failing on a nip up and bringing out the Cobra. Swagger runs from it but Hornswoggle gets the mini-Cobra. I swear none of these are sexual references. Swagger rips it up, causing the commentators to actually laugh. Commentary is horrible throughout this whole thing. The Real Americans work some nice double team moves at least. Tag to Khali, who comes in as hot as he possibly can. It ends up being Cesaro and Khali alone and Cesaro swings him to the delight of everyone. He pins a dizzy Khali for the win.

Winners: The Real Americans in 7:06
Outside of seeing Cesaro swing Khali, there was literally no point to this match. It wasn’t good, but the Real Americans did their best to try and make it watchable. I bumped the score up slightly due to the ridiculous feat of strength. *¼

WWE Intercontinental Championship
Curtis Axel (c) w/ Paul Heyman vs. R-Truth
They go through some uninspired back and forth in the early goings. R-Truth is popular, but the crowd doesn’t really care about his win/loss record and it shows here. Axel uses a spinebuster into the guardrail, which is pretty cool, to get in control. Axel is a solid hand but he’s a charisma void. The pairing with Heyman could have been better if he was booked better during the run. The fans are so bored that they chant for “JBL”. Axel wins with the Axehole or whatever he called his finisher at the time.

Winner and Still WWE Intercontinental Champion: Curtis Axel in 7:38
This is one of those matches that technically isn’t very bad, but it had no heat and an absolutely dead crowd. They were bore throughout and they had every right to be as the match was just dull. *¾

WWE Divas Championship
AJ Lee (c) w/ Tamina Snuka vs. Brie Bella w/ Nikki Bella
AJ Lee is sporting pigtails tonight, making this one of my favorite looks she’s ever had. Brie slaps AJ and sends her outside but Tamina stops her from capitalizing. Despite this, Brie stays in control inside until AJ kicks her in the knee and sends her into the ring post from the apron. It looks surprisingly vicious. AJ now works Brie over for a while, focusing on the arm. I appreciate that since it makes sense given her finisher and it’s not just working the arm for the sake of it. Brie goes into her comeback, complete with “COOME OON” shout, which is always grating. Tamina chokes Nikki outside, distracting Brie and allowing AJ to roll her up and retain.

Winner and Still WWE Divas Champion: AJ Lee in 6:37
To the people who feel that the Bella Twins haven’t improved, I’d like to point to this match. Brie Bella looked lost at times and if you watch something that she did in 2014 or 2015, you’ll see a better performer. Here, she struggled and AJ Lee wasn’t much better. *½

The Rhodes Family cuts a promo before the next match and it’s pretty great.

Cody Rhodes and Goldust w/ Dusty Rhodes vs. Roman Reigns and Seth Rollins w/ Dean Ambrose
If Cody Rhodes and Goldust win, they get their jobs back. Their opponents are the reigning Tag Team Champions, who have been pretty dominant in 2013. The fiery Rhodes brothers start hot, causing the Shield to regroup. They try to go after Dusty but Cody and Goldust go outside and it leads to a standoff. Dusty takes off his belt, looking to give a whipping and the Shield decide against it. Despite their fire, Cody and Goldust have to be careful to not get themselves disqualified. The Shield have weathered the storm and now have control over Cody Rhodes. Cody uses a picture perfect moonsault on Rollins to get himself free for the hot tag. He comes in hot and even busts out a top rope cross body for two. He makes the mistake of missing a regular cross body and falls outside. Cody gets off the apron to make sure that Ambrose doesn’t do anything to Goldust, which is a small thing but it is appreciated. The Shield now pick apart Goldust. He eventually makes the hot tag to Cody, who looks incredibly motivated. He uses some of Hardcore Holly’s old offense for two. Reigns comes in with his power but eats a Disaster Kick. He even knocks Ambrose off the apron. This leads to Dusty giving Dean a right hand and he brings the crowd to their feet with the Bionic Elbow. Cody kicks out of a rollup and hits the Cross Rhodes on Rollins to get their jobs back.

Winners: Cody Rhodes and Goldust in 13:54
The match is really good, but it is taken over the top by the angle they had to work with and the emotion involved. The Authority had been winning each and every week, so seeing the good guys get one meant a lot. The Dusty involvement was great, the Shield worked like a well-oiled machine and the Rhodes family had to do everything in their power to win. The fact that the performances in 2013 by Cody Rhodes didn’t lead to a mega push is a travesty. ****

We go to the Pre-Show Panel for some nonsense. Then Brad Maddox asks Vickie Guerrero for help in making the show run smoothly but she laughs it off. I guess that she senses how mediocre this show has been so far.

Bray Wyatt w/ The Wyatt Family vs. Kofi Kingston
At this point, Bray Wyatt had been on the main roster for about two months. He was about a month away from a legit feud with Daniel Bryan, so for now, this is pretty filler. Bray dominates the early goings, because he is clearly the guy they have bigger plans for. Kofi goes into his rally, getting the crowd somewhat into it but Bray just runs him over with a big body attack. There is a cool moment as Kofi leaps over the top and takes out all three Wyatt Family members. Back inside though, he falls victim to Sister Abigail.

Winner: Bray Wyatt in 8:17
Similar to most of this card, this screamed filler and would have worked better as a match on Raw or Smackdown. It was a prolonged squashed as the outcome was never in doubt. *½

CM Punk vs. Ryback w/ Paul Heyman
Ryback uses his power, but hen Punk retaliates with kicks, he exits to talk strategy with Heyman. Heyman’s advice is “HE’S A BULLY! STAND UP TO THE BULLY!” Some “you can’t wrestle” chants as Ryback slams Punk all around the ring and into the post. Anytime it looks like Punk may rally, Ryback goes back to work on the mid-section. After what seems like forever, Punk starts his rally. Paul Heyman gets on the microphone to call himself the “best in the world” and brag about pinning CM Punk at Night of Champions. It works beautifully as Ryback attacks from behind. It goes back to the story of Punk trying to come back, but Ryback being ready for everything. From seemingly out of nowhere, Punk uses a low blow to score the pinfall.

Winner: CM Punk in 14:47
Despite CM Punk being really popular, the crowd seemed to not care about this at all. Ryback’s dull wear down offense put them to sleep and even Punk’s rally attempts didn’t get much from the crowd. It was overly long and pretty boring. *¾

The video package shows just how much potential this rivalry had. From the Authority being vicious to Orton finding his “inner Viper” to the underdog Bryan and even to the involvement of Brie Bella. Then it all disappeared toward the end of the year and only picked up because CM Punk walked out.

WWE Championship
Daniel Bryan vs. Randy Orton
We get an extended feeling out process between the two men. Nothing really interesting happens until Orton goes all Nigel McGuinness with a lariat while Bryan is crotched on the top rope. Bryan skins the cat and uses a headscissors to bring Orton over to the outside but it looked pretty terribly. He followed with a much better looking suicide dive. Inside, Orton really starts to get more “Viper” like, focusing on picking apart Bryan. Outside, we nearly a table spot but Bryan sends Orton into the steel steps, then dives out onto him and then hits a flying headbutt for two. Bryan goes into a flurry of corner dropkicks that finally wakes the crowd up. Orton stops him and goes for the RKO but Bryan shoves him off. Orton rolls him up for two and Bryan’s kick out leads right into the Yes Lock. As Bryan has it applied, Big Show’s music hits and he runs out. He pulls the official out of the ring hard and looks disappointed in himself. Bryan questions him and gets knocked out. For those wondering, Show was doing the bidding of the Authority against his will at this time. Brad Maddox appears to send out the referee who was fired for the fast count he made during last month’s title match. Show pulls this ref out and hits him with the WMD. He gets in the ring and Orton scolds him, leading to him getting knocked out too.

No Contest in 24:00
Daniel Bryan and Randy Orton don’t really have bad matches together, but something about this one didn’t work, even before the dumb finish. It seemed to lack something that the other ones had. It’s like they knew they were working towards a no contest and didn’t put as much into this as they would their other matches. It picked up near the end, but not enough to save the score. **¼

Overall: 2.5/10; Bad. This show is pretty terrible. The opening World Heavyweight Title match is pretty good but everything else outside of the Shield/Rhodes tag match is either flat out bad or barely watchable. Even the Bryan/Orton match failed to deliver the ending a PPV this way is usually recipe for disaster. Go out of your way to see the emotional tag and avoid everything else. My next “Random Network Review” looks like it will be In Your House: A Cold Day in Hell!