Smackdown Report 9-19-14

I appreciate getting the actual Smackdown intro this week instead of just going straight to the ring. The main event is announced as Roman Reigns vs. Rusev, which will surely end in a disqualification or something. The suddenly healed Jimmy Uso faces Stardust to open the program. Commentary spends it's time hyping up how Smackdown is number one show on Friday for 15 straight weeks, which would be impressive if Friday wasn't a death night for most channels. Jimmy wins in about two minutes and then the Usos hit a double superkick on Goldust after the bout.

The mid card title feuds get fused here as United States Champion Sheamus tags with Intercontinental Champion Dolph Ziggler against The Miz and Cesaro. For those wondering, R-Ziggler and Damien Mizdow are both at ringside. This gets about ten minutes and is a good match but I hate that the number one contender to the Intercontinental Title eats a pin two days before his title match. Am I supposed to consider Miz a threat? Also, if he now beats Ziggler, how does that make Ziggler look? Meh.

We get recaps of the long running rivalry between SLATERGATOR and Adam Rose and his bunny. Adam Rose has a new fuzzy jacket and wins after his bunny gets involved again. I enjoy SLATERGATOR but they keep losing. The bad Mark Henry/Rusev angle from Raw is recapped before we go to the goddess that is Renee Young. She is interviewing another hottie in Lana and then there's Rusev. They say a lot of stuff that I don't understand, with some English thrown in there. Big Show teams with Los Matadores to take on the Wyatt Family. This is what the Wyatt Family has been reduced to. Remember when they beat the Shield twice? At least they win here.

More Renee Young! She interviews Roman Reigns who says the same stuff as always, about being a one man army who brings the fight no matter what. AJ Lee is out for commentary and this just keeps getting sexier. It continues as Paige comes out for a non-title match against Nikki Bella. I like that there's still some first time ever matches for Paige. This is short and Paige wins cleanly. So, Eva Marie and Natalya, who have nothing going for them, can get wins over Paige and AJ Lee, but Nikki, who ACTUALLY has a title shot in two days, loses cleanly? Not good. Nikki does lay everyone out and hoists the Divas Title in the air so there's that.

Time for more of the Bo Dallas/Jack Swagger feud as they have a rematch from Raw. It's also our weekly rematch! Bo Dallas manages to win this time and does his victory lap with his flab flopping around. He gives hope for guys like me. I Bolieve. Bo says that Jack has lost his swagger, which is such a good line. We then get a recap of the John Cena/Brock Lesnar/Paul Heyman segment from Monday.

We've seen Roman Reigns vs. Rusev before and just like then, this doesn't end cleanly or decisively. After a solid little eight minute match, Seth Rollins shows up. He tries to jump from the top and hit Reigns with the Money in the Bank briefcase, but catches Rusev instead, resulting in a Rusev disqualification win. Reigns and Rollins brawl, as Rollins scurries through the crowd. Rusev gets his arm raised in victory until Mark Henry and a giant American flag show up. Henry slams Rusev and this thing is over.

Another week, another nothing episode of Smackdown. I hate that you could totally miss every Smackdown and never miss out on anything. 4/10. Until next time, follow me on Twitter @the_kevstaaa.