We open to John Cena coming out and cutting the same promo as always. Literally he just talks about how he's ready to fight, how he likes the mixed reaction he gets from the fans and says that he will win the United States Championship. Well that's different. It's about time the belt became a factor in the feud. Rusev and Lana interrupt with Lana stealing the show by calling out Cena for saying the same old thing. Cena threatens Rusev so he's all like "you can't see me". Ha. Cena charges and they go at it. I love that Rusev didn't run. I know that it's okay for heels to run, but being a monster heel, him standing his ground worked well. Cena wins the fight here, throwing Rusev into the LED stage a few times. Good opening as it is preferred to the usual 30 minute Authority promo, was short and sold the match well. In honor of the 40th Anniversary of Saturday Night Live, Dean Ambrose did a Weekend Update type skit about Bad News Barrett. It was short and entertaining, since everything Ambrose touches turns to gold. He's here to open the wrestling portion of the show against Luke Harper. I liked the mention of how he beat a former IC Champion last week, Curtis Axel and is going to try and do that again now. I'd like to see him go over a bunch of former IC Champions on the road to a title shot. He has a contract for a title shot that he's trying to get Barrett to sign. The opener was damn good, as both guys are awesome and Ambrose won in about 11 minutes. I just wish there was something more for Harper to do because he's fantastic. Backstage, Kane and Big Show get into a tiff over their issues from Smackdown, while Triple H tries to play peacemaker. Show brings up May 13th, even though he meant May 19th. I really hope we don't get a Kane/Show program down the line. Next, Bray Wyatt cuts a promo about the Undertaker. He doesn't say the name, but it seems pretty clear. He's doing a good job of building this without his opponent around.
Stardust and Goldust are backstage when Dusty Rhodes come up and calls Stardust "Cody." He wants Stardust to focus on family and not the "cosmic" crap. He seems to agree. They head to the ring for a match against the New Day. Poor New Day still gets no reaction from the fans. New Day wins in just under three minutes, pinning Goldust. Post match, Stardust lays out his brother. Nobody is surprised at this turn of events as it was way too telegraphed. On the WWE App, he cut a great promo about Cody Rhodes being dead and how what he just did was a "beautiful disaster", which is an excellent play on his old move.
Roman Reigns is interviewed backstage about the Daniel Bryan situation.
He says that he gave Bryan the chance at Fast Lane and he'll take it away. He also calls out Bryan for not taking his Royal Rumble loss like a man. Bryan came out to do commentary during Reigns' match against Kane. He battles Lane for line of the night when asked about being stripped of the title. He responded with "I had one less defense than Brock Lesnar so they didn't have to strip me." SHOTS FIRED! The match is pretty dull and goes about six minutes before Roman wins via DQ. WHY? Seriously, the guy who I'm supposed to believe is a threat to Bryan and Brock Fucking Lesnar can't pin Kane? What's he gonna do, beat Brock via countout at WrestleMania? Awful booking. It's the opposite of making Roman look strong. Kane and Big Show are the trash that he should be annihilating.
We get another Bray Wyatt promo about the Undertaker before cutting backstage. The Bella Twins steal Paige's gear, causing her to exit the Divas locker room in just a towel. HOT DAMN! I should have just used Paige gifs for this entire report. She needs clothes and, after Cameron refuses to lend her some, steals a Rosebud's fairy outfit. When she came out for the match, she looked like an emo Katy Perry. It worked for me. She beat Summer Rae in pretty much the same match from Smackdown. It was a childish angle but whatever. Paige saves it by looking great and interrupting the Bellas post match promo. She says she doesn't need an outfit to look good and the only thing she'll be wearing on Sunday, is the Divas Title. Good promo from Paige. Also, the fairy she stripped was NXT's Blue Pants also known as Leva Bates. We are now taken to the Sheamus Returns promo because he's coming back. Soon. One day.
Seth Rollins, along with J&J Security, come out and cut a promo. He talks about being the future but he's annoyed by Ryback, Erick Rowan and Dolph Ziggler. Dolph interrupts and they trade barbs leading to a match. As usual, these two have a good contest and just as it was getting really good, J&J jump in for the DQ. Ryback and Rowan make the save and run them off. Maybe we get a six man tag at Fast Lane, so they can at least have something to do. Triple H comes out to respond to Sting responding to him last week so they can have a face off at Fast Lane so they have a potential match at WrestleMania. Got all that? After he talks for a bit, Ric Flair cuts him off. The fans are happy to see him. Flair warns Triple H about Sting. He should give him advice on befriending Sting, only to turn on him. HHH commends Sting for being loyal to WCW, but he says that if Sting came to WWE back then, he would have ran him out because he hates that Sting's legacy is built on Flair's reputation. Flair mentions that HHH lost to Daniel Bryan last year because he's not a wrestler anymore. HHH shoves him on his ass and screams that the WWE is the most important thing to him. This was solid. Better than the usual useless Flair appearance.
On the Raw Pre-Show, Darren Young was interviewed about his return when the Ascension interrupted and challenged him to find a partner. Young has a totally generic CAW as his partner. The Ascension beat them down until Titus O'Neill makes the save, reuniting the Prime Time Players. I liked them as a team, so I'm glad they're back, but it's random and the crowd didn't care. You know why? Because they jobbed as a team, they jobbed separately and they'll probably job again. I hope not though. Backstage, Miz tells Bad News Barrett to knock Damien Sandow down a few pegs in their match, while Miz will watch out for Ambrose. We don't get the catchphrase again, so is he just Wade Barrett tonight? Mizdow gets the advantage, so Miz rings a bell fo rhim to stop and makes him shine his shoes. Good lord Miz is a phenomenal heel. Barrett wins and out comes Ambrose. Miz does nothing to stop him. Dean ties Barrett to the post and uses his hand to sign the contract. This was pretty fun but if someone like Clarence Mason was still around, this would never hold up.
More cryptic words from Bray Wyatt, who is going all 1994 Undertaker by building a casket it seems. Time for mixed tag action as Naomi and Jimmy Uso take on Tyson Kidd and Natalya. It's announced that Kidd and Cesaro get a Tag Title shot at Fast Lane. Kidd didn't want the tag, but berates Nattie because he's such a good dick heel. Wise to have Nattie take the fall and I appreciate that to build this we haven't had tons of singles matches between the teams. Roman Reigns came out to wach the main event and was a complete ass but in a good way. He took photos with fans, chuckled when Bryan was in pain and dismissed his offense. By the way, it was Bryan vs. Big Show. We get a bullshit DQ finish as Reigns Superman punches Show. Seriously? The need to protect Show and Kane is sickening. This led to Bryan and Reigns brawling all around the ring which was the most entertaining thing of the night. Their dynamic has been fantastic. Both guys have looked like the heel and face at different times. This was a red hot way to close show, that even featured an appearance from NORMAN SMILEY! THE BIG WIGGLE! Even when officials hld them back and they shake hands, they go right back to rumbling. That worked as an exceptional close for a go home show.
I have to seriously commend that closing. We all know that the go home show is supposed to make us want to watch the Pay-Per-View and this did exactly that. I am more pumped for Roman Reigns vs. Daniel Bryan than ever before. They also built towards the Tag Title, IC Title, US Title and Diva Title matches well, plus the Sting/HHH stuff. My only real issue with the show was the booking of Kane and Show. They don't need to be protected and because of that, it led to a countout and two DQ finishes tonight. 7.5/10.
My patience with the idiotic booking is wearing out the more I get into NXT.
ReplyDelete- There's no justification why Reigns and Bryan didn't win outright on Monday night. What's even more telling and should be frightening anyone in the YES Movement is that Roman actually won (by countout) and Bryan lost (by DQ). The brawl afterwards was great, I imagine the match itself will be surprisingly good. But the booking heading to this point has been nothing short of absolutely abysmal and I can't say it any better.
- Is it just me or are the faces aside from Daniel Bryan totally prickish? Dean Ambrose forced Barrett's signature for a title shot at Fast Lane and John Cena wailed on a clearly defenseless man. Also known as Cena Did Cena shit. That aside, Ambrose was fucking hilarious with that news bit and he has made walking around with a clipboard look good.
- For those who forget, Tyson Kidd got a mention by CM Punk as a workhorse in his memorable Pipe Bomb promo from the first Raw of 2013. You now see what he saw then.
- I'm glad they're saving The Miz & Mizdow for Mania. Miz has been outrageously good as the 'bigger legend in his own mind than he is in reality' heel. I'm still salty that they crushed Sandow so prematurely when he had tons of momentum after winning Money In The Bank, but meh. It's what they do it seems.
- Stardust turning on Goldust couldn't have come at a worse time. Doing it against The Happy Happy Joy Joy Brigade, yeah..good choice. I really think even if these three went full blown heel and became the New Nation, nobody would care. That's really, really bad all around for them three. I liked Stardust's promo on his daddy about how Cody is no more and why he effectively railed against what he was so passionately angry about last Summer after Orton beat him and temporarily cost him his job. I imagine this goes down at Mania and puts the capper on Dustin's career.
- The Divas. Oy. Stealing someone's clothes? Is creative just finding shit off of video games and throwing it on TV hoping nobody catches it? (SVR 10, Santino sneaks into your CAW's locker room before a match, steals your gear and forces you to wrestle in a Chicken Suit for your next match.) Paige pulled off the look rather nicely, but crap like this is why nobody really takes them seriously.
- Sting. I like the build for Trips/Sting so far, even though I really, REALLY feel that this should be Dolph v. Trips at Mania given everything that's unfolded since last November. I caught the last bit of the segment on Youtube and honestly as a Flair fan, it's getting harder for me to see him appear on TV.
- Man have they totally taken the air out of Dolph's feel great moment at Survivor Series. It has truly been a sight to behold, I tell ya what. We'll probably get a six man at Fast Lane but honestly, I don't care. Aside from Seth, who's basically marking time before Orton FINALLY returns, it's whatever.
- I want to like The Authority more than I do. But with the likes of Kane and Show being nothing more than glorified idiots living off past glory, it's incredibly difficult. At least with J & J Security, we know they're goofs but at least they're entertaining goofs. The deck MUST BE RESHUFFLED and the dead weight have to be shed. I'd go for swapping those two big goofs out for the returning Sheamus and either Mark Henry (where has he gone since Survivor Series) or...Roman Reigns. (They have to face the reality that once he beats Bryan, no matter how clean it might be, he's definitely not going to be fully cheered going forward.)
The ending aside, I'm pretty meh on the rest of this. Good report.